West Wing
The Crackpots And These Women

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The Crackpots And These Women

Most of the staff is gathered around a table talking. Sam is reading USA Today! Bwah ha ha! Apparently they're catching Mandy up on a regular White House event.

Margaret: "We do it on the first of every month."
Cathy: "We've missed a few months."
Sam: "But generally speaking, we try to do it on the first of every month."
Toby: "We've done it twice in twelve months."
Sam: "We're a little behind."

Mandy, speaking for us all, asks what exactly "it" is. Toby explains that "It's 'throw open our office doors to people who want to discuss things we could care less [sic] about' day." I'm a little disappointed in Toby for saying "could care less," when he clearly means "couldn't care less." Mandy says this sounds like a waste of time, and Margaret agrees that it is, but it's also a pet project of Leo's. As Mandy asks why, Leo enters and begins to explain. He claims that Andrew Jackson would open the White House doors once a month to anyone who wanted to come by, and give all of his visitors cheese. It takes Leo a long time to tell this anecdote because he gets interrupted a lot. Early on, Leo says "I'm making a mental list of those who are snickering, and, even as I speak, I am preparing appropriate retribution." Toby asks, "Leo, wouldn't this time be better spent plotting a war against a country that can't possibly defend itself against us?" Hee hee! I forgive Toby for saying "could care less." Leo says they can do that later; right now he's talking about Andrew Jackson. Sam says that Leo is talking about cheese. Leo says, "And Sam goes on my list." Sam asks "What about Toby?" but Leo responds "I'm unpredictable." Leo continues, and a moment later Mandy interrupts. Leo ignores her, leading Sam to ask why Mandy isn't going on the list. Leo explains that Mandy is new, and returns to telling the staff that he thinks it is important for them to listen to people whose opinions aren't normally heard. Sam looks upset at the injustice taking place. Josh and C.J. walk into the meeting, Josh asking, "Is it total crackpot day?" When Leo admits that it is, Sam points out that Josh is also not being added to the list. As Margaret gives everyone their crackpot assignments, Leo escorts Josh to his meeting with Jonathan Lacey, the NSC guy.

Once outside the meeting room, Leo cuffs Josh on the head, saying "That's for 'total crackpot day.'" They walk into another room and Leo shuts the door and introduces Josh to Lacey. Lacey gives Josh a card and tells him to keep it with him at all times, and to let them know immediately if he loses it. Josh asks what the card is for, and Lacey explains that it will tell him where to go in the event of a nuclear attack. Josh is, understandably, boggled. As Lacey prepares to leave, Josh asks, "My staff goes with me, or do they have separate...?" He trails off as Lacey looks at him. Suddenly Josh laughs and says, "Sorry, you know what, I just got it, sorry." He takes out his wallet and puts the card inside "right next to my video club membership." Josh leaves and enters the flow of White House hallway traffic, still looking like a truck hit him.

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West Wing

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