The Wire
The Wire

Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: A- | 1570 USERS: B-
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"This Ain't Aruba, Bitch."

Lester again. A car rolls by, and it catches his attention, so he busts out his binoculars. Well, what do you know? Looks like Marlo and Chris and Snoop are getting pretty comfortable without their surveillance team around, and are already getting a little sloppy with their meets. Hmm...

Gus is in bed, and sits up, saying, "Fuck." His wife asks what's wrong, and he tells her to go back to sleep. He grabs the phone and hits a speed-dial, which calls the Metro Desk at the paper. Jay Spry answers, and Gus asks if the night man is still at the copy desk. Spry tells him he is, and asks if he wants to make a change. Gus says he just wants to check on the port story, because he's afraid he got the numbers wrong. After checking the numbers, which are correct, Gus says he "woke up in a cold sweat because I thought I fucked it up." Jay tells him all is well, and Gus thanks him and hangs up. Now that's dedication, folks. I like this Augustus guy. He's good people.

Down at the morgue, Jimmy steps in to check on his lady, and the coroner tells him it'll be a while. McNulty says he's heading "across the street for breakfast," and as he heads out, he hears a guy losing his shit: "Oh, come on, bullshit! This is not a murder! He overdosed! Look, we found his gear on the bathroom floor!" The assistant coroner is irate, and she says that even if they find heroin on the tox screen, it'll be listed as a secondary COD: "I've got petechials, I've got bruising around the neck. My preliminary is homicide by mechanical asphyxia." The guy, clearly a cop, is red in the face, and says he'll bring the paramedic in and he'll explain it. McNulty's been watching this whole interaction, because apparently the guy's partner is someone he knows. The coroner and the other cop each busts out in a huff, and the woman says, "Hey, Jimmy!" "Nancy, how's tricks?" "Heard you were working murders again." "Yeah. How's life in the county?" "Worse every year," she replies. "You guys can't keep all your dirt on your side of the line." McNulty asks what Kevin (I guess that's the other cop) is all hot about, and Nancy explains that some "new cutter's dug her heels in, says it's a murder. It's not, but I can see why she thinks strangulation." They walk over to the body; it's a young man, around thirty, with lots of tattoos. Nancy explains, "If I weren't there to see it, I wouldn't believe it myself. It's all post-mortem. He fires up a speedball, then blacks out, and falls between toilet and bathtub, manages to get himself wedged back pretty good." McNulty gives her a look. "I couldn't make this shit up. Medics come, pronounce him right then and there. But, get this: they can't pry the guy out without grabbing hold of his neck for leverage. We watched them do it, this Dundalk medic and the morgue guy. They just grabbed his neck and started yankin'." Jimmy seems fascinated by this whole story. "Finally, they get him out, he comes down here looking like a strangle job." "They can't tell that it's post-mortem?" "On a fresh body, no one can." She explains that if you're rough with the body soon after actual death, enough of the processes are still in place to result in bruising and petechia. Nancy asks Jimmy to buy her some scrapple at breakfast, and he obliges. He owes her for the good info.

The Wire

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