Beeping. Staring. Ding! Another ding. And another ding. Oh, Gillian, stop it with the damn dinging. What's that supposed to be, anyway? Is it Scully's biological clock? One-note wind chimes? An attempt to drive Mark Snow mad by insisting that he just tap one note on his Casio over and over and over and over again? Has Mark Snow, for that matter, perhaps passed out on said Casio, after too much Boone's Farm? Scully stares into the room. "Excuse me? Can I help you with something?" the doctor asks. Our heroine identifies herself as "Dr. Scully" and makes some comment to the effect that she was at the hospital and she just happened.... The doctor asks her to step out into the hallway. Scully does, looking tremendously uncomfortable.
The doctor explains that he's the patient's cardiologist, Dr. Kevorkian (or something like that). And that Waterston patient mentioned her. Scully sputters that Kevorkian must be mistaken. But he's not. "You were a student of his, right?" Kevorkian asks. Scully blushes. "He has a heart condition?" she asks. All over North America, people get up for a snack. "Yell when Mulder comes back," they tell their roommates. Their roommates just snore. When I decided to recap this episode, I was thinking more about, like, all the nutty New Age stuff that Gillian Anderson learned about in Kabbalah class and shoehorned in here, and, of course, the whole Did They Or What? Conundrum. I forgot about this whole Scully Had An Affair With an Old Dude and Has to Reevaluate Her Life Whilst Talking to A Really Boring Doctor part. Yeah, so Kevorkian says some stuff about medicine or heart disease or something. I don't know. I really don't care about this segment. Can we get to the Wacky Healing Lesbian Physicist and the lip-synching to Moby? Anyway, there's a lot of long pauses and medical-speak and it all ends with Scully saying that Dr. Waterston was "a remarkable man" and running away. I'm already exhausted.
Casa Scully. The front window is -- incredibly stupidly -- wide open. Why doesn't Scully just invest in a nice neon sign, reading, "Hired Killers, Kidnappers, and Aliens Welcome!" The wind is wafting inside, making the pull cord to the blinds tap against the window frame. Tapping. Tapping. Tapping. We get it. Tapping = clock ticking = time passing = Scully feels like her life is going nowhere. Let's move on. Can we get some aliens, here? How about a mystical mystery baby? Whale songs? Anyone? Hello? Yeah, it's still tapping. Scully comes inside and tosses her stuff down. She takes off her shirt and eats a block of cheese. Oh, that's me. And it's not really cheese when it's this hot. It's more like popsicles and ice chips. I hate this weather. The phone rings. "You came to see him?" the caller spits. "Who is this?" Scully asks. It's NotJorja. She hates Scully. That's all you need to know. Also, Waterston wants to see Scully. Scully muses that she doesn't know if she has time to go see the sick old man. "Look, it's your choice," NotJorja spits. "But if you come, it doesn't mean I accept you being in his life," she says, and throws down the phone. Man, what is her problem? I mean, sure, she's all bitter that Scully sexed up her dad and ruined her parents' marriage, but obviously Scully hasn't been in the picture for years. Get some therapy, NotJorja, and get pissed at your dad (the guy who had the affair), not the woman he slept with. Scully looks pained as Mulder buzzes through on the other line.













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