X-Files

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Daemonicus

The medic is, of course, Scully, because she's the only doctor on the eastern seaboard. She pronounces Kobalt "fine." I'd think he'd at least be dehydrated. Moronica watches Scully finish up her examination of the Vomiter, and walks down the hallway toward Doggett. "She's coming," she tells him. Doggett nods. Moronica wonders "what brought this on." Doggett admits that he confronted Kobalt with his expertise on Satanic history. Moronica doesn't think his expertise is proof of anything. But she thinks ignorance of Satanism is? Whatever. It doesn't explain the voices, she says, "or this." She holds up a vial of vomit as Scully joins them. "What if it's ectoplasm?" she asks. Ectoplasm? Jesus God. "Ectoplasm?" Doggett queries. "Agent Mulder used to refer to it as psychic plasma," Scully offers. "Agent Mulder likes sunflower seeds. Agent Mulder used to wash my hair in the bathtub and paint my toenails. Agent Mulder likes fish. Agent Mulder, Agent Mulder, Agent Mulder." Not really. Well, just that first bit. She then explains that ectoplasm has some kind of inorganic properties that make it...you know, not of this world. "So, what are we talking now, Ghostbusters?" Doggett asks. If only. This show could use a Stay Puft Marshmallow Man MotW episode. Moronica says they can send the ectoplasm to the lab, and prove or disprove everything. "You can throw that crap away, because I can tell you right now that guy's a liar. He's playing a game," Doggett spits. Scully mildly suggests they see how well he plays said game. Doggett's getting progressively more disgusted about how she's getting suckered into Moronica's Crazy Devil Theories. "Listen to you two!" he yells. "Agent Doggett," Scully rebukes him, mildly. Blah blah trick, blah blah Satan. Blah blah blah. "Agent Reyes is just trying to get to the truth," Scully says. "What are you doing?" Doggett glowers, and walks off.

Doggett walks and walks and walks and walks down the hallway. He looks in on Kobalt, who's meditating instead of bathing in bile.

Suddenly, it's nighttime, and it's raining. A guard reads a comic book outside Kobalt's room. He hears something untoward, and gets up slowly. Those Evil, Evil voices start up again, as the guard tip-taps off to investigate. Thunder and lightening. The guard looks in on Kobalt, the Most Boring Villain in the History of the Show, Ever. Kobalt stares and stares at him. Dude, turn on some lights. Suddenly, Kobalt is wearing a Buffy mask. The guard looks somewhat taken aback.

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X-Files

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