X-Files

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Baby, It's You

FBI HQ. Scully's slumped in a chair, her hand over her eyes. What the hell have I gotten myself into, she wonders. Why the hell didn't I get out of the damn X-Files when I could? Stupid Mulder and his stupid tight ass. Krycek is talking. He says they all need to know exactly what it is they're up against. Doggett points out that they're "all listening to a man who tried to kill [Doggett]. He left Skinner for dead." Yeah, he also killed Mulder's father and Scully's sister, among other charmingly evil deeds. Mulder asks Krycek to tell them about Billy Miles. "There are others just like him," Krycek says. "Call them what you want -- human replacements, alien replicants. They're unstoppable." Oh, and Krycek? So good-looking. Let's all just take a look around this room for a moment: Skinner, Doggett, Mulder, Krycek, and Scully. That's a damn good-looking quintet, not a sore thumb among them. I'm just sayin'. Anyway, Skinner wants to know what these alien replicants want. "They want to knock out any and all attempt by us to survive the final days," Krycek explains. "When they come back to retake the planet." Doggett looks skeptical. Everyone stares at everyone else, except for Scully, who is still looking at her own hand. Krycek settles into his comfortable and well-worn Exposition Sweater and explains that the alien replicants are "fearless." And they "answer to no one, other than their own biological imperative." Scully's still covering her face. Stare. Stare. STARE. Lots of pursed lips. "What about Scully?" Mulder asks. "What do they want from her?" Scully wearily rolls her eyes. "They want my baby," she breathes. She shoots sweet sweaty Krycek the look of death. "Why?" she spits. Krycek doesn't know how the aliens found how "how important" the baby is, he says, how "special" it is. Scully grits for the millionth time that her baby is perfectly normal. Krycek flutters his eyelashes. "Your baby was a miracle," he says "born of a barren mother's barren womb." Scully's all, thanks for reminding me about that. ["Plus just one 'barren' would have gotten it done, Repeating Redundant Boy." -- Wing Chun] Doggett closes his eyes. Mulder wonders aloud why the aliens are afraid of the sweet, helpless, normal MiracleNotAlienBaby. "They're afraid of its implications," Krycek says. "That it might somehow be greater than them. Something..." he shakes his head like he can't believe what he's saying. "More human than human," he finishes. "I don't believe it," Scully breathes. Skinner asks the obvious question: if the baby is so full of sweetness and human light, why did Krycek want him to kill it? He doesn't ask why Mulder was an equal trade-off, but I would still like to know. Krycek explains that he was trying to "destroy the truth before they learned the truth." Mulder stares at him. "That there's a God, a higher power," he breathes. Say it with me: huh? Isn't it possible that this isn't proof of God so much as it's...and Mulder, of all people...oh, whatever. Doggett rubs his eyes. He can't believe that they're all sitting around listening to a man they all know if a liar -- worse than a liar. Krycek smiles and reminds them that that they can't take the chance that he's wrong. He bats his lashes and completely gives Doggett the old eye. Man, the homoerotic sexual tension in this room! It could...you know. I don't know. Whatever. Krycek tells them that there isn't a hospital in the world safe enough for Scully to deliver in. Mulder glances at Scully, who's still all hiding her eyes Maybe she's afraid Krycek's hottiness will burn her retinas. Krycek says he doesn't even know if Scully will ever get out of the building. This last comment is too much for Doggett. "Why don't you just shut up," he barks. Mulder asks Doggett to "get on the phone." If they're going to get Scully out of there, they're going to need some help. Scully looks up at Mulder helplessly. Save me, big strong man! Save me and your MiracleNotAlienBaby!

X-Files

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