X-Files

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The Seventh Sense

Back at the Trailer of Love, Greasy sneaks into his car. As he starts it, Baldy gets out there and starts hassling him. Baldy swigs his beer. It's boring. Baldy tells Greasy that he knows the police were talking to him. When Greasy doesn't respond, Baldy breaks the body off his beer bottle and threatens Greasy with the jagged neck. He warns Greasy to "mind his Ps and Qs," or he'll tell the police what Greasy did to "that kid," and what he's got "buried out in them there woods." Brassy comes out and asks what they're doing, just as Baldy jabs Greasy in the neck with the bottle. Baldly sunnily tells Brassy that they're just talking about cars. Holding his neck, Greasy peels out.

Underwood Manor. An ambulance pulls away, as Scully watches. Mrs Underwood and Billy go inside, as Scully gets into the car with Doggett. She tells him that the psychic will be all right, if he's "at all curious about her condition." Doggett says that he doesn't believe her condition even exists, that he thinks it was all an act. Scully can't believe he thought it was a trick, although, thank God, she doesn't ask about the missing child in Doggett's life. I'm sure that's the last path she wants to retread. She whips out a handy dandy little tape recorder, and starts to play a recording of the psychic's seizure induced gurgling. No biggie, right? Well, when she plays it backwards, it plays a creepy choir of childlike voices, singing a nursery tune. Also, Paul is dead. Doggett looks perplexed. Just at this moment, Greasy pulls up in front of the Underwood house, and stares at the door. Doggett wonders what the hell he's doing there. Greasy is probably asking himself the same question, because inside his car, suddenly, is Billy, who places a hand on his shoulder and stares at him. Greasy gasps and screams. Doggett knocks on the window and tells Greasy to open the window. Greasy, instead, takes off with a squeal. Doggett screams to Scully that Greasy has Billy, and starts running after the car. Yeah, that'll work. After much running through the fog, and panting, and squealing of tires, Scully, of course, manages to catch up Greasy with her own car, and pulls across the highway to stop him. She and Doggett drag Greasy out of the car. Naturally, Billy has disappeared.

Over at Dale's Food and Gas, 9:07 PM, Mr. Underwood is filling up the minivan. He leans inside the car and tells poor shell-shocked Joshie that he's going inside to pay, and asks if he wants anything from inside the mini-mart. And this is the biggest hole in the plot of all, I think. If, God forbid, one of my children had been abducted, I would not leave the other one out of my sight, ever, especially if he were only ten. As a matter of fact, my little sister is eleven, and I certainly don't leave her alone in the car, ever. It's totally unrealistic that Mr. Underwood would leave Josh alone in a car at a gas station in the middle of the night, even for a few minutes. Anyway. Josh doesn't want anything. Mr. Underwood sensitively wonders if his not-dead son is okay. Josh just looks at him. Mr. Underwood goes inside to pay, and Josh looks out the window to see someone leading ponies into one of those pony-carrying van trailer thingies. Leaning out the window, Josh starts to ask his dad if he can go play with the horses, but Mr. Underwood is already inside the mini-mart. Josh gets out of the car, and, drawn by the irresistible power of ponies, walks over to the van. He looks around for the owner of the animals, and, not seeing him, starts to talk to the pony through the slats in the van. When he sticks his hand inside the slats of the trailer, a hand grabs him. Josh screams. I jump. On the side of the van is, guess what, the Blair Witch Project symbol. It's the logo of the world's most evil pony-riding outfit ever!

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X-Files

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