¡Ay caraumba, amigos y amigas! This week, we're going to take a trip down Mexico way with señor Doggett. Are you ready? Let's go!
Day 1: Doggett wakes up on the floor of a warehouse to see a dude stealing one of his shoes. "Hey, dammit! That's my shoe," he mumbles, then manages to stumble to his feet and chase the Shoe Stealer out on the street. Now, I've only passed out twice, but both times when I came to I was in no mood to chase someone for a shoe. A more rational reaction? "Why are you taking...wow, I feel...hmmm."
So, Doggett comes running out of the warehouse and into the street. The director -- one Michelle MacLaren -- has decided to do a Traffic-type thing with the film here; it's all overexposed and funky-looking. I like it. In fact, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that Ms. MacLaren did a very good job with this episode, and I'd also like to say that it's about time a woman who is not named Gillian Anderson got behind the camera on this show. So, there. Anyway, Doggett's all looking around Mexico (it's clearly Mexico; there are piñatas hanging in the streets and maracas on the soundtrack), a flummoxed expression on his face. Eventually, he sees the Shoe Stealer and takes off after him. He catches up fairly quickly (especially considering that he's running around with only one shoe), and grabs him. There's screaming in Spanish. I took French, so I can't translate very well, but the Shoe Stealer is basically yelling for help. Which arrives in the form of the police, who grab the shoe out of Doggett's hands, toss it in the gutter, and demand to see Doggett's papers. Doggett pats his pockets and comes up empty-handed. No passport, no visa, nothing. The cop rattles off something en Español. Doggett just stares at him. "Hombre, what is your name?" the cop asks. Doggett looks up with sad eyes. "I...I don't know," he says. Amnesia! Man, it's everywhere. There are two amnesiacs on Passions, for instance, and now poor Doggett! In fact, I was just reading the brilliant self-help book Having It All, by Erica Kane, and she mentions that you really have to be careful not to catch the amnesia. "At times, the condition seems almost epidemic," she writes. "The only way I can think of to protect yourself is to avoid head injuries or traumas of any sort, including emotional ones which can trigger amnesia instantaneously." She also advises that you avoid Pine Valley. I trust that most of you, my readers, do not spend much time in Pine Valley, but I am concerned that you might conk your head and forget everything. Everything! Maybe you all ought to start wearing helmets. Clearly, any one of us could fall victim to this dread disease. Be careful out there.