X-Files

Episode Report Card
Jessica: B+ | 599 USERS: C+
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That's No Alien, That's My Baby!

Haskill explains that Anne was a multiple abductee, and that the aliens conducted procedures on her while they had her. One procedure gave her cancer; one took it away. Scully purses her lips. I've never heard of such a thing, she thinks. I haven't, I haven't, I haven't! She looks away from Haskill, who explains that, finally, the aliens came and implanted an alien embryo in his wife's formerly barren womb. Doggett shoots Scully a piercing glance. Scully wonders if Haskill can prove any of this. He takes an envelope out of his pocket and tells her that it's Anne's ultrasound. One that shows a very bizarre pregnancy. A pregnancy that any Non-Evil doctor would be able to tell was all wrong. Scully looks at the photograph, as Haskill yammers that he and Anne went to three different doctors, and he thinks they're all in cahoots. Evil cahoots. Scully makes dismissive noises in the back of her throat, like she can't believe it's possible that anyone could have killed his wife and stolen their alien baby. Nevertheless, she gets his 411 and tells him that she and Doggett will be in touch.

After Haskill leaves, Scully thanks Doggett for such an "amusing" diversion. Doggett sputters that he thought she'd think it was interesting. " 'Interesting' as in preposterous and outrageous?" she spits. Um, what the hell? That's more preposterous and outrageous than your erstwhile partner, possible lover, and certain best friend being abducted by aliens? Than those two times you yourself were abducted by aliens? Than a cult believing that a banana slug is the second coming? Than Doggett getting shot through the chest and then vomited up all alive? Ladies and gentleman, I present to you Dana Scully, Queen of Denial. Doggett furrows his manly brow and explicates that he thought she'd be interested in Duffy's story because it's the same as her own. It's exactly what happened to her. Excepting the pregnancy, of course, he allows. "It's all there, in the x-files," he concludes. Scully narrows her eyes as the Violins of Invaded Privacy swoon. Doggett immediately looks guilty. Scully snips that she's impressed with his knowledge of past cases, but "[her] personal files are [her] personal files." Doggett looks at his lap and rubs his lower lip with his pencil. "Of course," he apologizes. Scully stomps out of the office. Doggett inwardly berates himself for being so stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

X-Files

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