Terminator 2

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: B+ | Grade It Now!
Terminator 2
Arnold, John, and Sarah get into an elevator. Dyson is left in the lab as the SWAT Team creep in. He's hyperventilating, because he's holding a heavy object immediately above the detonator. The SWAT team wisely scrambles, and Dyson dies. Kaboom. The parking lot is full of fire and smoke. And here comes Officer Robert in his mirrorshades. The elevator reaches the first floor, and the SWAT Team sends in a gas grenade as Arnold steps out. Sarah and John share a breather while Arnold goes out to deal with the problem. This, by the way, is the time that he says, "Stay here. I'll be back." Is that the lamest catchphrase ever or what? Arnold walks out of the smoke, ignoring the orders to lie on the floor, face down. The various officers riddle him with bullets, exposing metal, but he keeps walking. He takes out a pistol and shoots each officer in a leg until he gets to the grenade-thrower, which he uses to dispose of the last two in the lobby, as well as secure the parking lot. Then he walks around, taking people's gas masks until he gets to the SWAT van. This time, instead of hotwiring it, he finds the spare keys hidden above the sun visor. Then he drives the van into the spacious atrium, all the way back to the elevator. Sarah and John get in, and it is time to leave. Officer Robert has driven up to the third floor on his police motorcycle when he sees the van race off. The helicopter is hovering at just the right height for him to drive through the window and jump onto the copter. He breaks the windshield with his head and oozes in all liquid-metally. Once he's in the co-pilot seat, he tells the pilot to "get out." The pilot, knowing what happens to no-name extras who don't know their place, promptly jumps out. And Officer Robert is off after the van. Sarah wants John to stay under the bulletproof vests in the van, and she's trying to use some to block the window. Arnold identifies the copter as "him," so Sarah takes advantage of the numerous assault rifles on the wall. Unfortunately for her, there's a gun in the helicopter as well. Somewhere around here, Officer Robert supposedly has extra arms so that he can control the helicopter and fire a rifle at the same time, but I've never seen it myself. The helicopter follows the van at extremely low altitude, even flying underneath an overpass. This part of the movie is a lot like a videogame. Even more so if, like me, you're watching the DVD on your Playstation 2 and pausing it every few seconds. It's requiring a serious effort of will not to hit the fire button. Oh, there it is: Officer Robert is reloading his gun with two hands and has a third on the control stick. Whoopee. I only mention it because people keep talking about that scene. I have to tell you, it's not that great.

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