X-Files

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More Fighting of the Future

Random track in random rainy park. Doggett and Noel -- and I'm going to keep spelling it that way, although it occurs to me that it's probably his last name and not his first, and therefore actually, like, Knowles, or something, but screw that -- meet in a clandestine manner, Noel pretending to be cooling down after his run and Doggett dancing little circles around him, pretending to be some crazy guy with an umbrella who's obsessed with the guy cooling down after his run. ["This was the first episode of the show that I'd watched in a million years, and when Noel came on I asked Glark, 'Is that Krycek?' And Glark said he was. And I was like, 'He's all puffy! What happened to him? How does he have two arms?' And Glark didn't know. Because, as usual, he was full of shit." -- Wing Chun] Cryptic remark, cryptic remark, cryptic remark. Doggett tells Noel that he's been accused of being used to get Absalom killed. "Well, that's insane," Noel says, so unconvincingly that even my great-grandmother knows he's lying, and she's been dead for four years. Or has she? Anyway, Doggett is all fired up about the fact that he's being played; Noel can't say anything about that little problem, but he can tell him something. What? "Three words."

Cut to the street outside Scully's apartment. The Holy Virgin herself is getting into a cab -- going out for pickles and ice cream, perhaps? Or running out to pick up some fresh porn for her partner? Doggett races over to her side, apologizing for surprising her. He tells her that he has "something" for Mulder, but he wants her to tell him, because Mulder doesn't trust him. He tells Scully all about the stupid disc the Census Guy was trying to get to the president, and informs her that the passcode to the census data files is...wait for it....three words: fight the freaking future, the most obvious passcode ever, like why not just make it 1013? The theme song tinkles in the background. Mark Snow smiles at his own subtle artistry. Scully looks pained. I really hope all these pained expressions are just because the AlienMiracleBaby is giving her heartburn.

Scully goes back into her apartment. Mulder's working at her kitchen table. He's concerned that she's back so soon, and without the porn. "Did something happen?" he asks. Scully doesn't know if you ought to tell him. He thinks she needs to tell him. Stare. Stare. More freaking tears. I love you Dana, but get a grip. Tell him, don't tell him, but make the call and get on with your life.

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X-Files

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