X-Files

Episode Report Card
Jessica: C+ | 3 USERS: B-
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Doggett and Moronica scramble down the walls of the rock quarry, dust flying. They stop short when Doggett spies a tall guy in a leather-looking jacket running across the clearing. "Mooolder! Mooooolder!" Doggett yells. "Mulder" stops and stares up at them. "Moulder, it's John Doggett!" Moronica stares. "Mulder" just starts running again. Maybe to get away from her.

Elsewhere at the quarry, Scully gets out of her car and finds nothing. She calls Mulder's name. Nothing. This makes me sad. Poor Scully. Poor Mulder. Poor, poor me. "Mulder? Mulder!" Nothing. Finally, a man comes out of the fog. "Mulder?" Scully asks. But no. It's Michaud. Scully turns tail and runs. Michaud runs after her.

Running. Running. Running. Running. Running. Eventually, Scully finds herself at the edge of the quarry. She has nowhere to go. Finally, she pulls her gun and points it right at the guy who got run over by a train and didn't die. "Stop right there," she says, "or I'll put a hole through your chest and it'll take a really, really long time to regenerate! And then how will you look?" Since he can't be killed and is thus unconcerned by this threat, he keeps on coming. "Why do you want to kill us?" Scully asks, a question that must have run through her mind a million times in the last nine years. "Mulder must die. Mulder, or your son," Michaud announces. Hey, I wonder if this has something to do with that episode last season, when Krycek told Skinner he had to choose between Mulder's life and Scully's baby? Isn't that what he offered? I actually don't completely remember. Whatever. "What are you talking about?" Scully asks. I don't understand why these Super-Soldiers didn't kill William when he was born. I mean, they were all there. Or Mulder, for that matter, since he was there, too. Or are there two kinds of Super-Soldiers, the way there are two kinds of aliens? Maybe the Super-Soldiers are aliens! Maybe...oh, God. My skull. "What does this have to do with my son?" Scully hollers. "Answer me!" Michaud puts his hands up for a moment, then he has some kind of seizure-type thing and his face turns all black and charred and he shoots into the rock and disappears, clipping Scully on the way. Yeah, I have absolutely no idea what's going on here anymore.

Internet Café. I think. Whatever, Scully's at the computer. "I hold no hope you can respond to this," she types. "Or that it reaches you. I only hope that you are alive." My old pal, the Oooooooh EEEEEEHHHHH Ohhhhhh Music cranks it, old-school, on the soundtrack. "I cannot help believing that you jumped off that train because you knew what I now know. That these Super-Soldiers, if that's what they are, can, in fact, be destroyed. That the key to their destruction lies in the iron compound at that quarry. I am scared for you, Mulder. And for William. The forces against us are unrelenting. But so is my determination. To see you again. To regain the comfort and safety we had for so short a time. Also, the hot sex. Until that time, I remain, forever yours, Dana." Scully cocks a determined and familiar-looking eyebrow and looks over her email. Beside her, William coos. She smiles at him, finally, and rubs his soft little baby cheek. And hits "send." Oooooooooooh AAAAAAAhhhhhh. Ehhhhhhh AAHHHHHHHHHHH!

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X-Files

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