X-Files

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Jessica: B- | 1033 USERS: B-
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Meat Loaf's primping in the bathroom, and he looks up to see another message from BOB II. It says, "She Is Me." Nah. Actually, it says, "Kill Her. Also, I'd Like Some Ice Cream." Meat Loaf makes a pathetic face, and then BOB II appears and decks him. Man, Meat Loaf, you have to stop beating yourself up about this. Hee. See what I did there? Shut up, I wrote about insurance all day today. Eventually, Meat Loaf cracks his head on the side of the sink and falls onto the ground. Jane must have heard the hoo-ha, because she sticks her head in the bathroom. Without knocking. Again. Maybe you should kill her, Meat. Can I call you Meat? What about Mr. Loaf? She gasps when she sees him on the ground and, saying that she's going to fix him right up, goes to the medicine cabinet to fetch...you know, whatever. When she closes the mirrored cabinet, though, guess who's standing behind her? BOB II. She squeals.

Moronica and Doggett are staking out Jane's. Moronica's changed her shirt for the fourth time in, like, a day. Moronica tells Doggett to try to get some sleep, but he won't, because he doesn't trust her. Well, that part's just implied. And he doesn't want to talk about her dumb theory, either. "Okay, but just tell me a theory that makes sense," she says. "That theory doesn't make any sense!" Doggett yells. A couple of things: I love you, Doggett, you crabby loudmouth! Also, it seems that the horror of Doggett Loves Moronica is over. Praise Jesus. Or BOB II. Or William. Or that Canadian spaceship. Or whatever. "How the hell to you does that make sense?" Doggett asks. Moronica just looks sad. Doggett chatters that decent police work caught Meat Loaf once and will do it again and if that isn't enough he doesn't know what he'll do because that's all he has and he's thinking about quitting the FBI and taking off with Skinner to Vermont where they're going to open a B&B with another gay couple and call it Four Boys Only but Moronica could stay there too and maybe she'd like to bring that cute girl in Accounting. Everyone looks thoughtful.

X-Files

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