Back at Kristin's, she gets Brody's voicemail greeting and rolls her eyes as she clicks off the phone, complaining that it's the third time that day she's been ignored. She thinks Brody's acting really weird. Or maybe you are, Kristin? If you're not dating someone, three calls a day is a little much, no? She rolls her eyes again. What was that I was saying about eighth grade?
Back at the wine bar, Brody tells McSpellYourDamnNameRight about Kristin, how she's his ex-girlfriend, but it was five years ago, and they'll always be friends. She steers the conversation back to "meeting new people," specifically him. They resume typical first-date banter, in which he pretends to care about her life, and she mistakes his nookie-seeking for actual interest. Basically she's new to town, and therefore his target. She's having a hard time meeting genuine friends, blah-blah-blah, and Brody offers to be her genuine friend, hurl-hurl-hurl. He remembers her mentioning she surfed, but he doesn't think girls can surf. Yeah, tell that to this hot bitch. She coyly says she'll just have to prove him wrong, then mentions a "battle wound" on her foot. Brody immediately jumps at the bait, all, "Show me your foot!" Have to give it to the girl, she may be new to town, but she's a pro. She knows Brody's type, and she's playing him like a fiddle. Granted, Brody's a thick-headed himbo, so it's not the hardest to suss out. At any rate, they wrap up their sex eyes and head back to his place so she can show him her much-hyped battle wound. But first they huddle to make out and seek solace from the rain under a palmetto. As you do.
The next day, Brody meets Charlie for a round of golf-and-tell. They reminisce about old times, and it's not worth repeating. More to the point, Charlie wonders about Brody's "new bird." Brody admits Kristin was weird about him dating. Charlie says McKillMeWithThatJankAssName best be prepared to deal with some serious haggery. He knows that "even if she's nice, those girls'll just eat her up alive, man." Truth. Brody thinks you should just be able to hook up with a friend and still act normal. Instead, he and Charlie rattle off the prime tenet of Cowardly Booty Calls 101: Avoid "the talk" at all costs.












