As they walk from The House Of Winter Waterskiing to Luke's gay dad's house, Seth claims that the point is moot anyway, because he lives in "The P" now, and so does Jane. Gay Dad welcomes them and tells them they'll be eating soon, adding, "And we have a guest." From a hallway that leads, I'm sure, back to a construction site somewhere in the back, Sandy appears. "Hi," he banters. "Sandy Cohen." Seth waves. Sandy raises an eyebrow or doesn't.

In front of the now-almost-entirely-Cohen-free Cohen household, Marissa hops out of the driver's seat of a shiny red sports car and Tate Donovan gets out of the passenger seat. An attending Kirsten thanks them for coming, and they retire inside the house to recap the recapped recap of what's happened so far. Have you talked to Seth? What about Ryan? Kirsten talked at Seth. Marissa doesn't talk to Ryan. Sandy saw Ryan. Sandy is in Portland. Seth can't or won't close on Jane. Tate Donovan is out of shaving cream.

Marissa makes her way to the poolhouse, where she regards the emptiness of it and notes the folded up sheets on the unmade bed. She grabs the handle and doesn't turn it because, y'know, too weak. There. I said it again. Last time.

"So," exposits Gay Dad, all the better to dispatch with all of last season's lingering plot threads, "the last I heard you were opening a restaurant." Sandy tells him that it never ended up happening, adding for incendiary value, "There are plenty of good restaurants in Newport!" Seth reminds his father that he had said all of the restaurants in Newport were "overpriced and oversauced," because when it comes to expats going into self-exile, nine out of ten times it's because of some bad au jus. Sandy tries to change the subject by asking Luke whether he's excited about school, though I'm sure it will be hard to generate any real interest in the topic, because, I mean, who wants to start eleventh grade at thirty? Luke tells Sandy, "It's gonna be a little weird" -- because of being thirty -- "I gotta meet all the new kids. And they don't have a water polo team." But it's Portland! Even fake TV Portland has cool stuff, like a local chapter of the Sierra Club and a some social progressiveness and maybe even a tree that grew naturally somewhere. Sandy ventures something about a new gym in Newport, and Seth volleys back, "Are you working for the tourism board now?" Crickets. And I mean actual crickets, because there's nature in Portland. I've seen it in stories. Sandy tells him he was just trying to be polite, cautioning his young ward, "You should give it a try." Seth says that he'd rather be "honest," whereas I think he should actually be "in my apartment." See? We all have differences of opinion, but that doesn't make us lesser people. Sandy agrees on going for honesty, demanding, "Let's talk about the spoiled brat who's had everything handed to him." Seth tries to say this isn't about him, but Sandy counters, "Yes, it is. Because you're killing your mother and she is killing me." Seth says that Sandy can't just spend his life telling him what's so terrible about Newport and then expect him to go back, but Sandy reminds Seth that Newport is his home. In Orange County. In Califorrrrrrrrrneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeya. Sandy pulls that dad trick of saying that when Seth's eighteen, he can pretty much move wherever he damn well wants, and Seth wants to know why he let Ryan go and not Seth. This could go on indefinitely but there are other people at the table and awkward.