The Girls Plus Gay get in the water and start flailing around. Then we cut over to the Dudes Plus Dyke, who are flailing even worse. Johnny almost capsizes the boat, while Robin's in the other boat doing her best coxswain. It's something she's clearly practiced at.
Kenny interviews that they're doing well, but the only thing he's sorry about is that Paula isn't in the boat with them. Paula interviews that her team is a hot mess, and we watch as they struggle with an ill-fitting sail. At this point, we're not getting any long shots showing where the boats are in relation to one another, because the Girls Plus Gay are clearly just spinning their wheels. Another way I know this? Is that it appears Jenn has gotten out of the boat and is trying to push it -- yes, push the boat that weighs ten hundred pounds -- from behind.
Bananas is triumphant in interview, talking about himself in the third person, and we cut to the Dudes Plus Dyke moseying on up to the Island and running up to get the treasure. TJ is standing there smiling as they open the treasure chest with their keys. Ev says she'd follow Bananas into battle any day, and then Derrick interviews that he can now go home, "as a man, as a husband, as a dad, and be like 'I can provide for my family'." This guy makes me cry. Also, that money will last them about a year, but whatever! Tears!
Lots of hugging. Johnny grabs Evelyn's cheeks roughly and kisses her straight on the mouth. She sort of reels back and doubles over and thanks God she's the other kind of D. Bananas schticks it up with a line about how he's had booty before, but never booty like this. And then takes it too far by dragging the day he lost his virginity into it. Restraint, Bananas, restraint, please.
We fade to white and sad piano music plays as the Girls Plus Gay float up. Paula storms past everyone and goes immediately to sit in the treasure chest. Kenny interviews that this is a sweet but salty victory for him, because he had to screw his friend over so badly. Paula sits in the treasure chest and cries about being made a mockery of.