Time of Your Life
The Time The Millennium Approached

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The Time The Millennium Approached

Offensively twee credits.

Sarah comes home -- sporting her new cashmere coat from last episode, accessorized by the latest stripey Gap scarf -- to find Platypus talking to the television. Sarah scolds her for not showing up at work, or getting canned goods, or "doing anything on your list." Platypus says she didn't see the point, and Sarah starts nagging her about how necessary it is to be prepared for (cue scary music: dum dum dum) THE MILLENNIUM, and that Platypus has been in this J.B.-breakup funk for five days. Platypus insists, "I'm not in a funk, and that funk is definitely not about J.B. Please." Sarah says, "Romy, I am not going to go through another last night. I am not going to wait for the Mary Tyler Moore reruns to be over at three o'clock in the morning to get back my futon. Hello?" Apparently, Platypus didn't give any sign that she was listening to Sarah's tirade. You know, I find that when someone says "Hello?" to me in that peremptory tone of voice, they usually see the business side of the back of my hand. Hard. Sarah tells Platypus that she is going to move some of her stuff into the bedroom. This sparks Platypus to action -- she throws a mini-cow and hysterically insists that it's her room and Sarah is not going to take it away from her. Okay, Girl, Interrupted wanna-be? Here's a newsflash: tryouts are over. Winona made it, Angelina made it, you suck.

Scraggle-Faced Maguire finds his apartment door ajar, and creeps around looking at the mess. Oh, we get it. Break-in.

Joss arrives at work to have her boss-man tell her she's been late too many times. He asks her if she knows "just how close to the edge" she is. He's in the middle of saying that if he didn't have this "damn party to set up --" Unfortunately, we are left in suspense as to what threat might be forthcoming, because Joss gets a phone call. She promises him with regard to the party, "Ooh, I'm there. Just one call. I'm working, I'm completely working."

Scraggle is down at the station, telling an officer how much stuff was stolen: "They may have gotten more than this, I'm not sure." The officer is asking him if he has a value for the guitar when Joss walks in. She asks if they got everything, and can she make a really quick statement, because it's a really bad time for her to be leaving work. Scraggle is not sympathetic and tells her they took everything: "My TV, my stereo, my guitar." Joss asks why he's mad at her. The officer asks if she was the last to leave the apartment. Joss says confusedly, "I guess so." Apparently, there was no sign of forced entry, which means that Joss left the door unlocked. Scraggle is really pissed and says that he assumes Joss will stay to answer questions "as long as it takes."

Back at the Platypus Mound, the Platypus herself is making herself a cup of tea while pretending not to look into J.B.'s apartment. J.B. gestures at her to open her window and asks her if she is okay, since he's noticed her spending a lot of time in her apartment lately. Platypus lies through her beak and says that she's fine. J.B. asks if she has any plans for New Year's Eve, to which Platypus hands him a nice smelly pile of b.s. and tells him that she met some "new guy" and that they made reservations at the Gramercy Tavern. Granted, I don't know the time frame of any of these episodes, but since we know Platypus and J.B. didn't break up until after Thanksgiving, I think it is pretty safe to say that she would not have been able to make New Year's Eve reservations anywhere in New York at such a late date. In response to Platypus's question about his plans, J.B. says, "Oh, we are going to this new club. It's supposed to be really, really cool." Platypus asks, "Oh, who's taking you?" Ouch, below the belt! Literally. J.B. stares at her and Platypus corrects herself, "I didn't mean that. I mean, who are you going with?" J.B. tells her it's no one she knows and shuts his window.

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