Angels With Dirty Minds

Episode Report Card
Benzoate: D+ | Grade It Now!
Those Lousy Fourth-Quarter Numbers

Later that night, Heather finds Chandler in the courtyard, surprise, surprise. "Enemy fighters comes down on you -- it's always outta the sun so you're blinded," accuses Chandler. "That's the whole issue. I have never been your enemy," Heather pleads. Chandler thinks long and hard about this. The wheels in Chandler's brain go round and round, round and round, round and round. Finally, he admits she's right. These days, it's Peter who's been slowing down his project. Even with half of D2K's money? Peter's constantly questioning budgets, and even Jack is powerless. Okay, this is new. Heather believes that Peter just wants him to fail. Chandler wants to know how anybody could be so cold. It's like dating your father's wife only a month after he passed away. Heather pulls a Samantha, revealing that Peter's probably a prick because Maureen broke his heart in college. Chandler can't see how this would affect Peter, since he was dating a different girl every week. So that's why he's so smooth with the ladies! The opening bars of Whitney Houston's "Saving All My Love For You" are heard from next door, and Chandler wistfully notes what a great old song it is. While the song was written in 1978, it didn't really reach widespread popularity until Whitney Houston's début album, released in 1985. For more information on Ms. Houston, look for her Behind the Music special on VH-1. Chandler asks Heather whether she remembers their dance at the wedding. It was the lowest moment of his life, Chandler claims. While I've only followed his life for the past three months or so, I would say that making out with your stepmom, lying about your previous affair with her, and then lying about fathering Heather's now-deceased child are all probably lower moments than the dance. He surmises that they've really only had five seconds of happiness together. Oh Chandler. Most guys aren't so honest about their performance in the sack. He complains that he never really had a chance to court her. They did everything backwards and missed out on all the fun. Heather wants to know if he's asking for a do-me-over? He is. They make a quick joke about Richard's death, and begin to slow dance. Soon, Chandler promises, they'll be able to do this in front of the whole world.

Jenny's making David nervous with talk of the future, marriage, and little kids popping Flinstones Chewable Percoset. David's got his perplexed look on, but relaxes once they start making out again. Ah, sweet fornication eases the pain.

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