Titans
Payback's A Bitch

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Benzoate: C | 1 USERS: A+
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Payback's A Bitch

Just a refresher from last week: Jenny tried to surprise David in the shower, but got a surprise of her own when Laurie beat her to it. Heather discovered Peter's sham first love and threatened to tattle to Samantha if she wasn't reinstated as head of Dress2K. Gwen established a lifetime ban on Faith, but that didn't stop Ethan from co-ordinating a rave with her at Gwen's house. Gwen had fled to Santa Barbara to search her feelings and memories only to find Jack there, hoping to re-ignite a thirty-year-old crush. Drunk, high and giddy, Jenny returned to her house and took a stroll alongside the pool before doing a swan dive into the concrete and practicing the dead man's float. And now, a brand-new Titans...

We're still at the party and it's just kicking like a mother. Laurie and David have finished lathering each other (if you know what I'm saying) and have returned to the house. Laurie picks out a nearby stoner and asks what the heck is going on. The stoner replies in chorus with hundreds of thousands of viewers, "Duh, it's a party." The guy tries to make a move on Laurie, but David the Aussie comes to the rescue and demands to know who's responsible. Faith is the one they should be asking, because she emailed out all the invites. Speak of the devil, Faith and Ethan have moved the party upstairs to Ethan's bed.

When out by the pool there arose such a scream,
A party guest's response to the horror she'd seen
Away to the window Ethan flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash

The light from the tiki torches brightly ablaze
Give the illusion of daylight to all at the rave
When, what to his wondering eyes did a-flutter,
But Jen's bloated corpse face down in the water.

David hears the scream, which prompts him to run to the pool and dive in, a very manly and heroic move. He fishes Jenny out and lays her down on a blanket prepared ever so lovingly by big sister Laurie. Cross your fingers everyone. Meanwhile, Jack and Gwen have arrived just as Ethan gallops down the stairs. "It's Jenny!" he exclaims before leading everyone else to the pool. Laurie's screaming into her cell phone, begging someone to get down there ASAP. Unfortunately, she's dialed 411. David's already performing CPR. Too bad Heather's not here; she might have remembered something from Baywatch. We pull back and Gwen is reduced to motherly sobs.

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Titans

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