Titans
Pilot

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Meet the Titans
Richard bursts through Gwen's door. He can't believe that Jenny's been drinking and, worse yet, that she's smashed the car of the guy who cheated on his wife with her. There's some really shitty dialogue here to explain how both Richard and Gwen know about Jenny's histrionics. Pops wants her back in rehab, but the last one terrified her to death. Richard wonders whether he's to blame. Is it because he doesn't spend enough time with her? She is only thirty, after all. Taking a breather, Richard is thankful that every week isn't like this one. Me too; we're only forty-five minutes into this show and my wrists and fingers are killing me. Gwen reminds him that the week's not over yet. Isn't he getting married tomorrow? Shit -- that's right. We all forgot. Richard asks Gwen to come to the wedding. After all, he's never débuted a plane without her, why not continue the tradition with marriages. Um...yeah. They certainly are the most civilized divorced couple ever. Just then, Laurie and Jenny arrive. Jenny immediately starts to cry and there's a genuinely (as genuine as this show can get) touching group hug. Peter drops Heather off at her house. Hey, she's got a mansion too! Heather wants to know why Peter distrusts her. He knows that she manipulated Richard into ripping up the pre-nuptial agreement, and he won't stop until she's been revealed for the gold digger that she is. She responds to these charges by slipping off her dress and jumping into the pool naked. Why? Maybe at her parents' funeral she also vowed never to swim with a bathing suit on ever again. Peter doesn't respond which is our first hint that he may be gay. Gay or not, he gets off another great line when Heather asks him to join her. Peter refuses to jump in because he doesn't swim with sharks. SCORE! ["He's getting all the good lines? Then he's definitely gay." -- Wing Chun] Wow, it's the day of the wedding already and tradition is shattered for the first time today (there are more coming, trust me) when Richard sees his bride before the ceremony. She's livid that Gwen has been invited. He kind of apologizes. She wants him to do what he can to see that Gwen moves to some other mansion in Beverly Hills; across the street is just "too close." Richard says he'll do what he can. Uh oh, Samantha Sanchez has been eavesdropping on their whole conversation. Shouldn't she be doing some laundry right now? She runs outside and meets up with Laurie and Jenny -- again appropriately dressed for Hollywood Boulevard -- and their mom. Samantha reveals Heather's plans to Gwen, but never fear: nobody -- not Richard, certainly not Heather -- is going to get Gwen out of her home.

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Titans

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