Stormy Heather

Episode Report Card
Benzoate: C- | Grade It Now!
"Do not have sexual relations with your father's wife; that would dishonor your father."

There's a board meeting in progress at WGE. Gwen proposes renovating all of their resorts. By focusing on the exterior, moving to the lobbies, and then finishing with the interiors, the job should cost no more than $15 million apiece. All she needs is a green light. It sounds good to Richard, but he'll need a week. Perhaps he's going to run it by the shareholders. Oh I forgot, this particular multinational, multibillion-dollar corporation doesn't have any. Meanwhile, Peter looks at Chandler, Chandler looks at Samantha, Samantha looks at Heather, and Heather looks back to Chandler. Tag, he's it. By the way, tonight is a big night for Dress2K. There's going to be a fashion show and everyone's encouraged to attend to support Heather.

Samantha storms out of the meeting, and Chandler's in hot pursuit. "Are you avoiding me?" Chandler asks, looking his usual earnest and sincere self. Isn't it the other way around? He owes her an explanation. She can rule out (a) he's married; (b) he's gay, so that leaves (c) he's involved with someone else. What about (d) he's carrying on a quasi-incestuous relationship with his step-mom? Chandler fesses up that there was someone else while he was on leave, but she dumped him and he got all messed up. Heather is eavesdropping around the corner. I haven't mentioned it yet, but she's wearing a hideous red blouse with a red, pink, and orange scarf and lipstick and rouge to match. She must have set her make-up gun to "whore." Chandler knows he's screwed up everything, but Samantha claims she's not interested anymore. Neither am I, but I need the paycheck. He's disappointed and catches the eye of Heather, standing ever so sexily against the wall (I didn't' think that "sexily" would pass the word check but it did). She gives him some kind of "them's the breaks" eye twitch with accompanying mouth tic that's really not that flattering.

Preparations are being made for tonight's fashion show. A lackey is reminding a member of the technical staff not to use too much smoke. Smoke? At a fashion show? Samantha apologizes for being late. She looks at the clipboard and informs the lackey that it's all wrong. The models are supposed to be there by 5:00, not 5:30. Everything has to be perfect, or there'll be hell to pay. And Heather's going to be the one to dish it out. Speak of the devil, Heather has arrived and is all smiles and sunshine with Samantha. However, she can tell that Samantha's work ethic is a symptom of her trying to avoid something. Is it Chandler? What happened last night? We already know that he canceled at the last minute on her doorstep. "You mean he drove all the way over to your house and then changed his mind?" Heather asks. Yeah, we didn't really get that either. Samantha is convinced that he's madly in love with whoever dumped him in Hawaii. Only in Canada you say?...er, I mean madly in love you say? (Warning: previous reference only applicable to Canadians born before 1975).

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