Star Trek
TNG: “The Game”

Episode Report Card
Keckler: C- | 3 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Levels of Orgasms
Etana makes with the orders: "The expansion will begin as follows: Commander Riker --" Yeah, where was the "Commander" down on Risa, Etana? Wait, I don't want to know -- he probably calls his Linus "the Commander." Although, knowing Riker, he probably bumps it up a few notches and calls it "the Admiral." "You will pilot a shuttlecraft to the Cleon System where you will rendezvous with the starship Endeavor. Proceed with distributing the device to that vessel. Commander La Forge, Counselor Troi, take a shuttlecraft to Starbase 67. Distribute the device to all starships currently docked there," Etana continues. Lord, I just typed "Adama." Can you imagine? Him? With those devices? No, don't, actually. Not unless you want to be drunk for the rest of your life. The lambs need to stop screeeeeeeeaming! Picard steps forward and proudly announces that they've had the opportunity to introduce the game to Starfleet Academy. Etana is pleased and says that the Ktarians commend Picard's efforts. Wait, aren't they actually Riker's efforts? "You and your crew will be rewarded," Etana says. With Orgasm Game X Box? Do you know how gross that is? Wesley walks the corridors, getting visibly creeped out by all the devices on people. If he's out in public, why isn't he wearing his faux game? Wesley gets on the turbolift and finds Nurse Ogawa moaning. She greets Wesley and asks what level he's on in the game. He looks down at his faux game and says he's on level ten. Ogawa turns to him and says, "I'm on level [gasp] forty [gasp] seh-ven [sigh]!" She moans. "That's great," Wesley says uncomfortably. "You know what the secret is, don't you? Don't force it. If you just let the game happen, it almost plays itself." Ogawa gasps AND sighs. "I'll try that," Wesley says, and darts off the turbolift. In Engineering, Wesley rounds behind Lefler's chair and says he thinks they're going to be okay, but he just has one more thing to do. Not noticing Lefler's oddly tilted head and unfocussed look, he babbles out some techno. "What are you doing?" Lefler wonders slowly. More revealing technobabble from Wesley. He finally looks up and realizes Lefler's hooked on the junk. She stands up, saying, "It's your turn -- play the game, Wesley." Riker and Worf appear and start to bear down on Wesley's console. Wesley plays ring-around-the-hos-ie and slides over the Engineering quad-console to escape into the corridor. Runny chase, chase.

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