Top Chef Just Desserts
Top Chef Just Desserts

Episode Report Card
LuluBates: A+ | 1234 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
"The Red Hots are for My Mommy!"

Obviously the judges like the most chemical panna cotta-y dish of all. Seth is prepping to go out and he is so pathetically insanely frantic that Zac feels like he has to go help him. And really, Seth's insane like if Yogi Bear snorted a bunch of meth and was out trying to steal picnic baskets and just couldn't do it and was about to start crying for his mommy. Who wouldn't help? Seth has managed to compose himself in front of the judges to present his blueberry gimlet cake that truthfully looks like square bird poop. Malika's blood orange and blackberry mojito cake with white chocolate mousse looks delicious by comparison. Of course, my flip-flop looks delicious in comparison, too.

Unfortunately the judges don't like it because it is too sugary and not enough agar agar or something. Heather H. made a White Russian-inspired dessert that inspires no comments from the judges. In the kitchen, Seth makes [more] an ass of himself by destroying Zac's chocolate squares [it was an accident, he swears! Wait, no, it wasn't him at all!] and then getting in Zac's way to the extent that Zac fails to tuile one dessert. One dessert that, of course, ends up in front of Gail. Who takes it personally and before anyone can stop her is wandering the Moors in her wedding dress moaning, "Where's my tuile? Where's my tuile?" Zac tries to recover by introducing his dish as a Benedictine bomb, which sounds like a terrorist act but look delicious. The tuile had tarragon in it, but he doesn't want to talk about it. And neither does Gail. Tim has made a basil pudding with lime granita and kumquats. The judges like Zac's dessert but compare Tim's pudding to eating scrambled eggs in soup.

The contestants sulk in the Stew Room until Gail comes in and asks to see Erica, Yigit, and Eric. Seth aims to support his fellow chefs by claiming Eric's dessert was not Bottom Three material, but ends up feeling sorry for himself and inviting everyone to suck his lollipop. Or that's what I imagine he said because they bleeped it. No one looks eager to take him up on the offer. At the Judges' Table Gail asks everyone how her hair looks and when they pinkyswear she looks super pretty she tells them that they had the best three desserts. Everyone looks extremely happy and Yigit almost hyperventilates while Eric honks like an asthmatic goose. Gail recommends they all shut up so the judges can talk now.

Top Chef Just Desserts

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