Top Chef Masters
Blinded Me With Science

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Weird Science

The chefs head to Whole Foods for the usual shop n' talk. Hugh is making an okra salad where the kids have to make their own mayonnaise. Yeah, THAT should be a big winner with the teens. He's going to have to sculpt those little okra in the shape of Justin Bieber if he wants the teens to even consider letting them past their lips. Naomi on the other hand is making pizza with three different types of flour to show how elasticity is affected. Traci dead pans that she is going to cook fish in acid a.k.a. ceviche. Ricotta was too boring. The end. It's too bad Traci can't buy some charisma at Whole Foods.

Back in the kitchen, the chefs and their scientists start cooking. I wonder how they decided who gets to be Dr. Honeydew and who gets to be Beaker? Mary Sue and her partner get cracking and soon have a dulce de leche mousse in a petri dish and churros frying in a Bunsen burner. She is going to show viscosity by how quickly the various sauces run down the churro. Floyd is making a beef shabu shabu to reveal how you don't get a Maillard Reaction. He keeps going on and on about how he has a scientific background and how proud his dad would be, you know, if he was alive. Hugh has turned his scientist into an herb picker, because whenever he talks Hugh falls asleep, which is detrimental to work flow. Naomi's Hot Pockets aren't as easy as she had hoped, but she will persevere. Once the justifications and excuses start rolling this early in the competition, it usually means that the competitor is doomed. Doomed! To which I say, nooooooooooo. Not Naomi, nooooooo! Take me!

The next day the chefs and their scientific sous chefs head to the high school for their science fair. As per usual with these off-site challenges, things are hectic and stress levels are high. How high? If only one of the scientists on this show could calculate that. Naomi is stressed about her calzones and their propensity to blow out. Traci is concerned that her fish will taste good. That sounds dirty, but it's not. Mary Sue's oil is not heating up properly and she can't cook more than a few churros at a time. Hugh is battling with his scientist Augustine about mayonnaise placement and Augustine is dishing out scientist slurs about how Hugh isn't curious and stuff that is probably a cold diss in the science circles, but here sounds... confusing. Back to the lab, four eyes! Suddenly the gates of hell open and the high school gym is flooded with doe-eyed high school students hungry for knowledge or at least fried food. Mary Sue is making excuses for her churros again, but she has good rapport with the kids as she fries and drizzles her toppings of varying viscosity. Hugh is having fun emulsifying his salad dressing and he has relegated Augustine to frying okra. Judges James Oseland and Ruth Reichl make his fry shack their first stop, while Padma (Padma!) and Curtis swing over to Mary Sue's for some churros and a lesson in viscosity. The dulce de leche is the slowest! Or it would have been if Padma hadn't interrupted the lesson to sassily swipe at the sauce and sexily suck it off her finger. I had to cover my eyes so I wouldn't be corrupted by such lascivious behavior so I don't know what happened next.

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Top Chef Masters

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