Top Chef
Bike, Borrow, and Steal

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I Know You Are, But What Am I?

We open the morning after Chris's elimination. Grayson feels bad because she and Chris were very close. She doesn't mention that her dumb chicken salad idea may have helped him get eliminated. Ed wakes up wearing shorts, a button-down shirt, and a jacket. Did he plan this ahead of time? Did he pass out drunk last night in those clothes? He stumbles into the kitchen explaining that he's all business today. It's a funny visual but I need some backstory. Paul and Lindsay are amused, at least. Lindsay interviews that she wants to make the final four, and that her family wasn't "ecstatic" about her becoming a chef, mostly because very few chefs make much money (not to mention that it's a tough lifestyle). But, she adds that her family has always been supportive. So she's either winning or going home today.

Quickfire Challenge! Padma stands there with a table full of pancakes. Stacks and stacks and stacks of pancakes. She explains that their challenge today will be making the favorite food of the guest judge: pancakes. Grayson supposes it's a kid of a child star "like Miley Cyrus or something." Oh, Grayson. Miley Cyrus is not a child, and she's not so much a star anymore. Your reference is about three years too late. Padma reveals that the guest judge is Pee-wee Herman! He rides in on his bike. Oh, Pee-wee. You kind of make me sad now. And note that the guest is Pee-wee, not Paul Reubens. Like he's clearly losing his hair so he has to comb his hair forward and...ugh. I don't know why this makes me sadder than the competitions with, like, Sesame Street characters as guest judges, but it does. Grayson totally invents a memory of eating pancakes while watching Pee-wee when she was a kid, like how convenient that she remembers that! Anyway, the winner gets $5000, and I'm not even going to report Pee-wee's "jokes" because they all fall flat. His schtick only works if he's in the Playhouse or in Pee-wee's magical world. In the real world, it's all kind of depressing.

Sarah is making confetti cake pancakes. Lindsay also has a memory of eating pancakes while watching Pee-wee. Come on. Ed reports that his favorite part of pancakes are the edges that get crispy, so he's doing "a play on that." In other words, he's burning some batter and calling it a dish. Paul is making champagne Dippin' Dots using liquid nitrogen. Didn't that company just go bankrupt? If only they had been able to hang on until Paul discovered their next big thing - alcoholic ice cream of the future! Seriously, I think that could have caught on. Grayson and Lindsay are both using ricotta in their pancakes, but Grayson is making hers look like Minnie Mouse for the whimsy factor. Sarah's sprinkles are dying the batter pink, which is not a great look, so she's worried.

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Top Chef

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