Top Chef
Culinary Games

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | Grade It Now!
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Frozen Food

Paul starts plating his food. He runs out to serve the judges, knowing that it's not his finest plate. He knows he has no one to blame but himself. I love that he takes responsibility instead of bitching about how it's a stupid challenge (because it is). Paul is the best. Anyway, he walks into the restaurant with his food and finds Padma, Tom, Gail, and Olympic snowboarder Gretchen Bleiler. I totally know who she is because of the aforementioned newborn twins in 2010. Like I knew before they even put up her chyron. That is sad. Paul made seared lamb loin with curried mushrooms and wasabi crème fraiche.

Sarah points out that there's no clock in the gondola, so you have to judge when to finish your dish by how close you are to the gondola docking station (or whatever it's called, I don't know. I haven't been skiing since I was in middle school.) Sarah serves chorizo sausage with onions, prune juice, gooseberries, and pickled mushrooms. That sounds like something they'd serve at a nursing home.

Beverly is trying to make her dish seem more interesting than just raw fish (since that's what it is), so she fries up some capers to add complexity. She is a dork. Her dish is salmon tartare, anchovy horseradish crème fraiche, and crispy capers. It looks like cat food.

Lindsay is the final cheftestant to serve in this challenge. She realizes at the last minute that she doesn't have enough salmon. She cuts her pieces in half and calls it good, and honestly, the pieces are now an appropriate size. They would have been way too big before. Her dish is seared salmon, red quinoa "risotto" with chorizo and horseradish vinaigrette.

Let's talk about the various dishes. Tom liked Paul's dish, although he thought the meat was a little underseasoned. Gail adds that the meat was unevenly cooked. Gretchen... who cares? Tom wishes he could have tasted the prune more in Sarah's dish, and Padma liked the acidity of the gooseberry. Gretchen... who cares what she thought about Beverly's dish? Tom thinks a good tartare needs to be ice cold, which it was, and the horseradish made the dish, and Gail compliments her knife work. Tom is impressed with how perfectly Lindsay cooked her salmon, and Gretchen who cares. Seriously, am I supposed to care what a snowboarder thinks of the food? Anyway, they all write down their scores on paper and pass them to Padma, who announces that the winner gets $10,000 and doesn't have to cook in the next two events. Tom says that they were expecting at least one person to stumble, and no one did. Paul came in last, and Sarah came in third place. So between Lindsay and Beverly, who won? Lindsay! So she's through to the finals. I thought we were already in the finals, but what do I know? Nothing, I guess. Hey, let's draw this season out even further, because it hasn't seemed long enough already.

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Top Chef

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