Top Chef
Less Is More

Episode Report Card
Keckler: C+ | Grade It Now!
Cheaters Seem to Prosper

They have seventeen minutes left. Marcel tells us he's confident about everything but Betty's cookies. Sure enough, Betty is having problems. The cookies are oozing all over the Silpat. Betty tells us that she "completely forgot" that hard meringues have to dry out in an oven overnight. Well, at least eight to ten hours in a very low oven, but, yeah. And, duh! Welcome to Pastry 101, Betty. See, baking scares the living Shuna out of me, but one process I feel comfortable with is hard meringues. Marcel tells us, rather mincingly, "Betty's dish is just plummeting. It's failing. In other words, Betty is failing, and I know if the Black Team goes down, she's going to throw me under the bus any chance she gets." Again with the damn bus! What is with this show and buses? Don't they know everyone in LA drives cars?

Next morning, the teams get dressed. Elia does more yoga, and Betty tells Josie she's already packed her bags for Elimination. In the kitchen, Betty goes around kissing all the guys good morning. Oh, she's one of those women. She even asks Marcel if he wants a kiss. "Sure, I'll take one," Marcel aw-shuckses. Betty kisses him. Does this mean she needs to chain herself up during a full moon? Maybe she can just drink a Snape potion. Michael tells us, "I feel so confident in the challenge, I really want to win it, expecially [yes, he said "ex"] since the remarks that one of the judges [he's so stoned, he can't even remember which judge, and there were only two] had made to me in the Quickfire. I do want to be here, I know no one kidnapped me." Really, Michael? Are you sure about that? It's like that Jill Carroll tape when she was saying, "No one kidnapped me. I'm being treated fine. I have food." Michael's "dead confident" he's not going home.

Back in the Krappy Kenmore Kitchens the next day, the cheftestants finish up. Betty tells us that because her cookies failed so miserably the day before, she's starting all over again. Josie reminds us, "We were signed off on a menu that the nutritionist observed; we're prepared to honor what was signed off on." Food flurry. Cliff tells us, "You assume everyone is on the honor system [on] day two because of the nutritionists, but you never know." Michael throws a shifty look at the camera. Sam tells us that on the second day, when the nutritionists weren't there any more, there were squeeze bottles of olive oil on the line. He saw hands "just randomly squeezing olive oil wherever people wanted to put it." Carlos tells us, "Betty's meringue cookies were not turning out on the first day. The second day, I had noticed the recipe had changed -- the cookies visually looked different. They were smaller and had a different consistency." Betty tells the cameras that on the first day, she had too many egg whites, so now she's reduced the proportion of egg whites and added "two more tablespoons of the sugar." Whoa, whoa, whoa -- I thought she was supposed to be using Splenda! Betty tells us that since the nutritionist told them their calorie count was at four-hundred-forty, she felt very secure that her diddling with the recipe still kept them under five hundred. However, St. Betty, Patron Saint of Teeth and Screaming, you are now playing with a recipe that the nutritionists DID NOT APPROVE!

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Top Chef




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