Top Chef

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | 1034 USERS: B-
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What Just Happened?

Someone says that there's only eighteen minutes left and Jen shrills, "EIGHT! TEEN! MINUTES??????" Look, maybe she had an extra cup of coffee. I don't know. Anyway, Spike is supposed to be helping Fabio with gnocchi, but Fabio thinks that Spike is being too rough with his precious potato pillows. As they pack up for service, Antonia wonders the same thing I did about gazpacho and gnocchi as breakfast dishes. As they pack up, Casey tries some of Jen's dish and interviews that it tasted like "wet bacon." Since Casey is apparently the only cheftestant who tasted it besides Jen, we have to assume she's right. Jen keeps pulling off pieces and tasting them and going, "It's good, it's good. I think it's good." So Casey keeps her trap shut. Perhaps she could have said something, but they're headed out for service and what's Jen going to do at that point? Not serve anything? Serve some hard boiled eggs? And it is a competition, and Jen was the first to point that out. Anyway.

They all start setting up their buffet lines before the diners arrive. Blais, Angelo, and Marcel made a fruit parfait. They taste it just before service, and Angelo says that he thinks the plums are too large, and they should cut them up. He gets Carla to do it. Marcel utters two gems: "I think it fucks with the integrity of the plums" and "you don't fuck with someone else's mise en place." Marcel thinks Angelo might be sabotaging his own dish, apparently? I don't put it past Angelo to fuck with things, but I don't think he would sabotage his own dish.

Now that they're nearly done, Jamie returns and tells people that she got two stitches. Dale L. interviews that he took a chunk out of his thumb one time, and duct taped it and kept going. I don't want to second-guess Jamie too much, and I would probably be crying like a little bitch, but I do think she should have at least tried to suck it up. Anyway, she starts helping Jen out as much as possible, which is really just plating at this point. Casey says that she liked Tre's sauce when she tried it in the kitchen, but she didn't have time to try it again just before service. As Tre sauces the plates, his sauce does look kind of thick and sparse, though.

The kids and their parents arrive for service. Every one wants meat and eggs, although Carla says that the people that do come through their line are very receptive to their dishes. The judges show up with their guest judge, Katie Lee (no more Joel), who Tom reminds us hosted the first season. And she was horrible. Why is she back? Her cookbook came out ages ago, so what's she promoting? She still has a totally blank look on her face. Like if you didn't watch her season, and you think Padma is blank sometimes, you don't know Katie. She was a host-bot of the highest order. Anyway, they head to Team Brontosaurus first.

Top Chef

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