Top Chef

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What Just Happened?
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I think they're trying something different with the "Previously On" segment, and I like it. Instead of the usual "Previously on Top Chef" voiceover and then clips from the last episode, they intersperse interview footage with various chefs with short clips from the previous episode. So most of the footage is new interview footage that we haven't seen before, or footage from the Stew Room that we didn't see before. Anyway, it's a new way to help viewers who missed last week get caught up, while not totally boring people who did see it and just want to get into the new challenges. I usually FF through the Previously On segment because by the time I get to it, I've already watched the previous episode at least two or three times to recap it, and I'm not interested, but I found myself watching this. I'm not going to recap it, because there's really no new information, but I'll give you an overview: the chefs realize that this competition is no joke, they respected Elia's skills and then she got eliminated, Richard got disqualified for going over time, Angelo won, and Fabio was pissed because he felt Bourdain was overly mean. There you go.

Every time I watch the opening credits now, all I can think of is the version they did for last season's reunion, where it was sexytime. That's all I can see now. And Mike is in there, and I don't like it.

The cheftestants enter the kitchen to find out about the Quickfire. And guess who's there? Joe Jonas! I immediately recognize him as a Jonas brother though, since I'm not a tween or a parent of a tween, I wouldn't know which one he is. Spike claims to immediately recognize him. Antonia definitely does, since she has a daughter who is a Jonas Brothers fan, and will be insanely jealous when she finds out that her mom was in the same room with a Jonas. This is like if my mom had met Kirk Cameron circa 1986. I would have FREAKED OUT. Meanwhile, Dale T. is like, "He's who?" and admits that he thought Jonas might be a pastry chef. Heh.

Padma explains that there is going to be a sleepover at the Natural History Museum, and Joe Jonas will be the special guest. So the Quickfire Challenge is to create a midnight snack for the kids, and Joe Jonas will pick the winner. Blais interviews that they have no idea what Joe Jonas's palate is like, so it's hard to calibrate the flavors. Is he a cheese doodle guy or a gourmand? And will he be picking the dish that he likes, or the one that he thinks the kids will like? Joe Jonas gives further details on the challenge: there will be no plates or utensils available, so the snack must go in a brown paper bag, and they have... thirty seconds. Everyone kind of freaks out internally before Joe admits that he was kidding. Okay, that was actually funny. A few of the cheftestants definitely bought it. Padma laughs too, and then says that they have forty-five minutes, and starts the timer.

People start running around grabbing ingredients and equipment. Dale T., like Blais, is worried about cooking to an unknown palate. Dale L. is worried because he knows that kids are picky eaters. So his strategy is just to throw a bunch of sweet and crunchy stuff into some marshmallow fluff and call it crack for kids. And frankly, it's not a terrible strategy. Then everyone is looking for sugar in the pantry, but no one can find it. Fabio yells out, "Who has the shooooo-gar?" Turns out that Dale T. has the sugar on his station, and Casey explains in an interview that the proper etiquette for a common ingredient like that is to take it out, use it, and then return it to the pantry so that others can find it. Instead, everyone has to run around looking for it, and then visit Dale's station with a cup and scoop some out. That is kind of a dick move. I can see Dale's position, which is probably that he doesn't have time to run it back, but it's not like he took some esoteric ingredient that no one else needs. It's sugar. They're making a snack for kids. Nearly everyone will need it at some point. Thus, selfish.

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Top Chef

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