Brian tells us, "I've enjoyed the entire ride, I've cooked great dishes, I've left with the greatest amount of respect, I've made friends. I think I was a little cutting edge, maybe a little bit ahead of my time. Maybe I'll be celebrated when I'm gone." Does he mean when he's dead? Because it's not exactly like how Van Gogh wasn't appreciated in his own time. He left paintings behind, Brian, and you don't get to leave stuff behind unless you plan on leaving a fridge full of food, which is sort of gross. In the back, Brian tells the others that there's no reason to shed tears over his leaving. Sad thing is, they don't actually look like they are. Brian tips his cowboy hat and bows to the remaining three. Dale tells us it's really tough to see him go. The three clap him out and Brian says, "Thankyouverymuch," which makes me wonder if we've just met a fifth personality who has been busy impersonating Elvis on the Las Vegas stage in Brian's mind this whole time. Brian says he's going back to his life and he's happy that he didn't play it safe during the whole competition: "I blew it up and I had a great time and if that's why they're gonna send me home, I'm riding home on a magical carpet." Yes, you are. All of you.

Casey, Hung, and Dale hug each other tightly and Dale says, "I won one, goddammit!"

Next week: we've got Todd English with not enough powder on his greasy face, Rocco with way too much scruff on his, Michelle Bernstein with way too much Sandra Bernhard, and Ted with way too much Gail.