Top Chef
Social Service

Episode Report Card
Keckler: C | Grade It Now!
Ain't it Offal, Mabel?

The cheftestants are all brought out and everyone in the ballroom applauds. Jennifer Coolidge thanks everyone for coming and thanks Social for hosting, "Most of all, I just really want to thank these amazing chefs for doing such an incredible job. I don't have much to do with the decision making tonight. You know, I used to work in this building -- it used to be a pool hall -- I was the cappuccino girl here. I got daily complaints that I didn't give anyone enough foam, so I shouldn't be the authority on anything." She wishes them luck. Betty tells us how rewarding it is to know how hard you worked at doing something you loved. Ted Ilan reiterates how proud he is of what they all did. In the kitchen, the cheftestants toast each other with wine.

Judges' Table. Colicchio mentions how he was in the kitchen so he saw how good the cheftestants had it in terms of leftovers. Oh, here we go again -- the bashing of what ingredients they DIDN'T use. Michelle adds, "What better than coming into a kitchen filled with the freshest, most amazing ingredients, that, honestly, is a cook's or chef's dream." Except that they WEREN'T the "freshest" ingredients. They were LEFTFUCKINGOVERS! That was the whole point of the freaking challenge! There was no way you could call those ingredients the "freshest" unless you had a goddamned farm in the walk-in with little migrant workers pulling up roots and greens and tubers and shit. I really hate the hypocrisy in this episode. Colicchio goes on, "You know, there was some beautiful baby purple artichokes in there that nobody used, there was sea bass... " Dude, they had salmon, scallops, lobster, shrimp, and FUCKING CRAB! "Duck confit," Michelle adds. THEY USED DUCK! "Fruits de mer. It was everything from our Social menu -- I'm a little bit upset," Michelle says. You're upset that they didn't use what was on Social's menu? Wouldn't they then have been dinged for not being original enough? I mean, I know Social has a great menu, but get over yourself, Michelle. The judges continue to go on about how the cheftestants -- without limitations, without restrictions -- did not take advantage of the wealth of Social's leftovers. "I get a sense that no one's trying to win, they're just trying not to lose," Colicchio says. Given that both Josie and Michael have talked about how they are comfortable in or aim for the middle, I can't say Colicchio is wrong. He goes on, "Some of the choices they made were a little confusing. It's pretty clear that these guys didn't work together in creating this menu." Of course it's clear, you were in the kitchen the whole damn time and you SAW them not working together to create the menu. However, they DID work together to get all the dishes out -- why don't you comment on that, Coldickio? Michelle adds, "Of course, there were some lovely things on these plates, but some of them shocked me to the point where I got angry." I think you have anger issues, lady.

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