Top Chef
Top Chef

Episode Report Card
Kim: A- | 971 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Keep It Simple, Stupid

Carla thinks that gumbo is the best dish to represent New Orleans. She may be right, but a twenty-minute gumbo is going to be tough to pull off. Andrew warns the current crop that they have to bring their A-game, or he will stomp them and piss on their bodies. Somebody's trying a little too hard. I don't want someone who's about to serve food to be talking about blood and piss, thanks.

Hosea nearly sets Leah's arm on fire with a flambé. Metaphor for their relationship? Leah explains that New York doesn't have a specific cuisine, since it's such an ethnic melting pot. Nikki explains that she's really competitive. Bleh. Those two are boring.

Stefan and Andrea share a beer, and he teases her about not eating meat. She reveals that she does actually eat meat. They drink their beer out of plastic containers, and then Stefan interviews that Andrea was kicked off her season early (and twice), but she may have learned more technique since her season. You can tell he doesn't really believe that, though.

Weird interstitial. Spike puts on a Green Bay helmet and ties a towel or flag around his neck and bullies Fabio and Jamie. He claims that the show should have ended after his season. Some would argue it should have ended much earlier, dude, so watch where you go with that argument.

Morning of Elimination Challenge. Hosea wakes up early and eats breakfast while reviewing his dish. He explains that he wants his season to win all the challenges, but he mostly wants to make sure he wins his challenge and that his food is good. Fabio and Jeff wake up and Fabio complains, "I'm thirty years old and I still have to sleep in the bunky bed." I'm going to be so sad when Fabio gets eliminated. He makes me laugh. Fabio interviews that his mother is sick, and the money he could get from winning the competition would help with her medical care. Oh, I really thought he was a goner after that one. At least they didn't make him call home.

Carla sits alone and meditates with her eyes closed, except I think she's actually sleeping because you can see her eyes flicking around all REM-like beneath her eyelids. It's pretty creepy. Stefan the loudmouth asks if she's meditating and she's kind enough not to say, "Not anymore, BUTTWEED!" like I probably would. Carla interviews that winning this would give her some momentum and self-confidence. The cheftestants head out to the competition.

Top Chef

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