Top Design

Episode Report Card
Mr. Sobell: C | 506 USERS: C+
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It's My Party, And I'll Cry If I Want To

Off to the party, for the judges at any rate. The Top Designers have to hang back in the White Room, watching the event on closed-circuit TV. The only way that could be more humiliating, I think, would be if the Top Designers were forced to stand outside the tents with their faces pressed up against the window -- occasionally one of the guests would toss a crudité at one of the Top Designers and titter bemusedly as the six wrestled on the ground for a scrap of food. It is also at this moment that we are treated to our first full shot of this week's installment of Sartorial Blunders with Kelly Wearstler, brought to you by the 1980s. This week, Ms. Wearstler sports a fetching gown-jeans mash-up that says both "casual" and "please cut me off at the bar now." She's dressed exactly like the quirky friend in a late '80s romantic comedy would be -- the kind who eats a pint of Hagen Das with Meg Ryan and exhorts her to go back to Tom Hanks before they both start trying on hats while a Katrina and the Waves song plays. ["But which Katrina and the Waves song?" -- Joe R] It takes a special person to carry off that look -- sadly, none of them are judging Top Design.

Let's take a gander at the rooms, starting with Team Architect (Plus Erik). "We kind of describe it as like, space, glamour, fun, eclectic, contemporary styling," Erik says. Are you sure you didn't leave an adjective out there, cowboy? There still might be one or two left in the dictionary. According to Andrea, the guests enter the tent on axis on the short side, encountering that latticed wall that nearly crushed Goil a couple of times. In the center, there's a DJ and a dance floor, with two of the deconstructed chandeliers featuring Bacardi Limón bottles and lemons off to one side of the floor. The centerpieces are these bristly-looking red flowers (touch!) and cut lemons (smell!). "Conceptually, [the Bacardi Limón ] bottle is key," Goil voice overs. And what does Team Discord's resident grumpus think about all this? "I think their ideas were really ambitious," Michael says. "But I think our design, overall, was executed better." We'll be the judge of that, my man. Matt describes their tent as "a crisp and clean environment." The front of the tent is open to encourage people to come on in. There's a DJ in this tent as well, but no go-go dancers; instead, Team Discord hired a particularly beefy doorman. The cocktail tables have lost their Bacardi Limón caskets and are filled entirely with lemons. "My favorite part of this design is just the overall look of it and the concept," Carisa says, which she credits entirely to the skill and genius of the designer responsible for it. "Yeah, I designed it, so I love it."

Top Design

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