Richard, with the favorite appetizer of the evening, and Antonia, with the favorite entrée, will be joining Stephanie in the Clintonian hamlet of Puerto Rico. The three newly minted and very excited finalists leave the kitchen for a group hug, leaving Lisa and Spike to get their asses handed to them. Before starting in on this week's performance, Colicchio offers a recap -- Lisa's been on the bottom at judges' table five times to Spike's seven, and that combined with the judges' recent comments should mean that so neither of them is surprised to be standing there right now. Colicchio feels that Lisa lacks drive and ferociousness "when it comes to some of the ingredients that you're working with and some of the things that you're doing". Plus, the shrimp dish sucked. Your talk contains passion and drive, but your walk, alas, does not.

Spike, says Colicchio, makes poor choices -- "everything that goes on the plate is there by design", he continues, and serving the scallops was "a huge mistake". Colicchio appreciates Spike's lip service to simplicity, but "if you're going to cook using very simple flavors, everything has to be perfect". And since it wasn't, Spike offers his thanks and his hand to the judges, hugs it out in the stew room, talks about how amazing he is, and packs his knives and his haberdashery. Lisa, on the other hand, promises to "bring it" to Puerto Rico, and whatever "it" is, it isn't her greasy hair. Based on the previews, she's lopped it off in favor of a short, spiky 'do which looks like an improvement (albeit of the icing on a turd variety). It's just my luck that I'll be out of commission for part one of the big finale and the unveiling of Lisa's new coif (so Spike will be there in a way), but there will be a superb and well-versed sub, and I'll be back to recap the last episode, so please don't get too upset. Team Stephanie!