Oh, lovely shots of San Francisco. We've got Fisherman's Barf (tourists go to "feel San Francisco," but all the locals avoid the masses of humanity like Minnesotans avoid the Mall of America) and some typical Victorians (my neighborhood!) as Harold tells us he's a chef from New York. He admits that he first started cooking in high school as a way to meet girls, but then he discovered he had a "knack for it." Given that he looks like the foodists answer to Matthew Fox, I'm going to bet he discovered he had a knack for cooking AND meeting girls.

Next is Andrea, the token earthy-crunchy, whose last apartment was probably in a tree that was about to be cut down. Andrea cooks healthfully and teaches other people how to cook healthfully. She got into the healthful cooking thing when she had a bout of hyperthyroid trouble, and she improved her life when she improved her diet.

Miguel arrives as the token Latino. He cooks in large New York hotel and cooking is his passion. I'm sorry, but there's something about Miguel that looks Down Syndrome-y. I know he doesn't actually have it, but he definitely looks like he could be one of those kids on Sesame Street.

Oh, dear, here we have Candice: the model who eats. She's young, she's pretty, and she's a culinary student. We see her getting fitted into a bikini as she says, "I'm trying to steer away from the modeling world and into the culinary world." Bikini Candice makes a monster face at the camera to show how NOT a model she is.

Brian, the token black dude, steps out of a car wearing a baseball hat and a tweed jacket. He's a personal chef for the likes of Eddie Murphy, Mariah Carey, and Mary J. Blige. "You know, people who can afford me," he notes. Do they all have to be "of color" as well?

Ken, the token British islander, does martial arts in his application video. Not sure why that's pertinent, dude. He says that he trained in a kitchen that was "very militaristic" where the head chefs flipped the plates onto the ground if they didn't like the food. Wait, did he work for Gordon Ramsay? Because I'd love to call this tool DonKen. It's a Hell's Kitchen joke. DonKen flashes his knife around a bedroom in the new house. He jabs, parries, and flourishes. I don't want to be around while he's carving a turkey. Meat everywhere.

Lee Anne arrives at the house. She's the token Asian chick. I know, technically, Candice is also Asian, but she's too busy filling the role as the token pretty girl who knows very little about food. You know, because she's so pretty. I might as well tell you right now that Lee Anne is my favorite. She tells us that she's the Executive Chef of Event Operations at the French Culinary Institute in New York. Which means she knows Jacques Pepin! Another reason to be friends with her.