Trading Spaces
Orlando: Whisper Lakes

Episode Report Card
Deborah: C | Grade It Now!
Orlando: Whisper Lakes

Frank mortars the fireplace.

Hildi says that once they've spiced up Laura's life, she can get some TLC, by which she means "tender loving care" and not the network. Dennis outlines their plan for Laura: "Trading Spaces, first, A Dating Story, A Wedding Story, A Baby Story." Frink: "A Divorce Story." Me: "Yeah, why don't they have that?" Frink: "Can't be much longer." Me: "But they should call it Shouting Match, even though it screws with the pattern." Frink: "Or All Over Except for the Shouting."

Frank sticks some of those custom-broken shards onto the mortar. They discuss the size of the gaps for the grout.

Jennifer tells Dennis she's so relieved about the colour. Dennis asks, "Hey...did you see the way Hildi was flirting with me?" Jennifer: "No." Dennis: "What's going on with her?" Jennifer: "You wish." Dennis: "You think it's the passionate red?" Oy. Stop. Trying. So. Hard.

MPDP comes into Frank's room and starts asking questions. Frank tells her his plans.

Hildi seems to have decided to break into the small, pointless wall by the entry. It's about four to six inches thick, and maybe three feet high and eighteen inches wide. I'm sure this is some builder's idea of creating a sense of "entry" for the front door, but all it does is make the entry narrower at a point where you'd like to have some room. You can't put anything on top of it because you'd always be knocking it off. It doesn't effectively divide the foyer from the living room, it doesn't provide any meaningful architectural interest, and it's about as vestigial and useless as it gets. All it does it call attention to the vacuousness of this approach to home building. Of course, the light switches have all been located in this little architectural appendix. Hildi's got Amy Wynn sitting there, rooting around in a big hole in the wall, trying to explain why you don't just demolish a wall without knowing what's in it. It's the sort of thing a professional would understand, which is why it has to be explained to Hildi. Amy Wynn tells her that she's not an electrician and she's sure it's possible to relocate the switches, but it's not something she can do. Hildi: "You didn't take Electricity 101?" Man, for somebody who clearly doesn't have a clue about the reality of residential structures or much of a grasp of the basics of design and decorating, she should watch the snide remarks. Amy Wynn pleasantly replies that she didn't, but plans to in her next round of college courses. Hildi: "Please do." Me to Amy Wynn: "Please slap her." Hildi goes on about wanting Amy Wynn to be able to accommodate her desire to knock out walls whenever. Amy Wynn jokes about learning plumbing, too. She suggests that they now focus on patching the wall.

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Trading Spaces




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