Trading Spaces

Episode Report Card
Deborah: B- | 474 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Scottsdale: Windrose Drive

MPDP says that the room is beautiful. I want to take her aside and explain how you can like a person very much and still think their work sucks. Heck, I don't dislike Frank. I think he's entertaining as hell and probably has a heart as big as all outdoors. And he's easily the most quotable character on the show. But I don't think he even qualifies as a decorator, never mind a designer. Rooms like this are "proof undeniable." MPDP says Frank spent $937 and change. Good God, on what? Textiles, I guess. There's almost nothing in the way of new furniture or carpentry projects. Frank seems bummed about that. He could have gotten a couple more pillows or something. Yes, if there's one thing this room lacks, it's pillows. I count about thirteen or fourteen, not including the ones meant to be slept on. MPDP says she thinks it was a great decision to paint the ceiling. Frank says it squashes the room and makes it smaller. Well, it makes the ceiling feel lower, is what it does. I like dark rooms and painted ceilings but I think it's a tricky look to pull off with a floor so much lighter than the walls, as is the case here. He mentions that he really didn't change the floor plan that much. Well, he hardly ever does. Alert the media. MPDP says that Ty did a great job on the cabinet. Frank agrees. MPDP says that the drapes fit so much more beautifully in here now. A close-up shot of the valance shows just how terribly off-centre and uneven the stencilling is. MPDP says she loves the decorative element Frank added to it. Lord, is she blind? Maybe that glimpse of Ty's crack did more damage than I thought. Frank says that people always thinks of apples and fruit and chickens (heh) when they think of stencilling, but that you can find wonderful stencils that are repeats of patterns. He says that to him, a bedroom should have a lot of pillows. Well, no one can fault him on pillow quantity. MPDP thinks the homeowners will get a kick out of these nightstands. Frank seems to have gotten the idea for the tables from the way they were displayed in a store. MPDP asks, "What do you call that above the bed?" Me: "Godawful? A crime against fabric?" Frank says it's a "mini-canopy." What. Ever. Frank says he's always liked a lot of fabric; he doesn't know why. MPDP: "More stuff to hide your flaws." Yikes. She said it in a really nice way, but I get the impression she had no idea how that would come across. Especially to a person of size. Frank suddenly digresses into a discourse on the greatness of the muumuu as my husband and I look at each other wondering what the hell happened to the editor. He concludes his little speech by declaring the muumuu a perfect garment. MPDP laughs in a way that somehow manages to seem both genuinely enthusiastic and yet forced, and declares this a "perfect bedroom." What are these two on all of a sudden?

Trading Spaces

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