Shout-out to Vel.

MPDP appears on a gorgeous stretch of beach wearing a navel-grazing hot pink t-shirt with a black strip around the bottom and her jeans rolled up. She's carrying her shoes. There are clam- and beach-related remarks I won't be recapping. The homeowners are Eric and Kim, and Nancy and Rich. We're informed that they live to spend time at the lake behind their houses. Shots of homeowners cooking out and paddling their canoes. Back to MPDP, who's forming the letters "TS" out of shells in the sand. She pretends to yell at the designers, calling them "beach bums." Cut to Kia and Hildi, relaxing on loungers in the sand. Hildi's wearing a jean jacket over a bikini and a sarong, and saying she would love a drink right about now. At the sight of Kia and Hildi, I'm sure even the teetotallers in the audience feel the same way. MPDP introduces them as "our hyphenated heroines, Kia Steave-Dickerson and Hildi Santo-Tomas." Ty ("our cabana boy") arrives carrying a tray of fruity-looking cocktails, and spills a red one all over the yellow cushion on Kia's lounger. I think he mostly missed her, but she's wearing a red shirt anyway so it probably wouldn't show.

Rich (wearing a yellow, red, and green floral shirt I think Frank would particularly like) and Nancy (wearing a pink and red patterned shirt that gives me a headache) want their bedroom redecorated. I mention their taste in clothes in an unsubtle attempt at foreshadowing. Nancy says that the room is too dark. Rich wants something very romantic. He says that they've been married for nearly seventeen years and that this is the one room they always start and never finish. The room has sunny yellow walls, dark blue carpet, and dark blue tab curtains. The furniture suite is all dark brown wood, and there's quite a lot of it: headboard and footboard, nightstands, a small cabinet, chest of drawers and mirror, and dresser. The bed covering features a leopard-skin pattern. The TV, though, is on a red metal five-drawer tool chest. Attractive. Rich says it's 100\% off-limits. Dude. Are you serious? He says it's not to leave the room. Nancy says it is. He says it's not to be painted. They bicker about whether or not it's going to end up in the garage or the bedroom. As it turns out, the way Kia decorates this room, he can bring it back in and it won't matter one bit. Rich ends up by telling Nancy, "If it's in the garage, you're going in the garage." Nancy says that's fine. And Rich wants a more romantic room. I don't think that's going to do it for you, bud.

Kim and Eric think their living room lacks a focal point. The room has mostly beige walls with one olive green wall, and beige carpet. Beige curtains. The large olive green wall has a small, ineffectual arrangement of 4" x 6" photographs on it. The room has a bunch of either rattan or bamboo furniture with nasty-looking cushions. There seems to be a cabinet or armoire opposite the sofa, but we don't get a clear shot of it, and I can't tell if there's a TV in it or what. Kim says they don't look out toward the yard -- which is very pretty -- because they just have these boring beige curtains. There's a child's plastic desk and chair and a child's drum set in front of the window. In the far corners of the room are a mostly empty curio cabinet and a large palm tree. There are two entrances to the room, each of which has a couple of steps down into the room. Kim says she doesn't want any orange colours. Eric says he doesn't want any primary colours; he'd prefer something warm. Kim: "Colour, but not a crazy colour." Eric says that when they moved into the house, he begged Kim to get rid of the "wicker" furniture, but lost the battle: "As I normally do." Kim says the room is nice and just needs new cushions. She wouldn't care if it were painted. Eric: "Or gone. Painted, gone, whatever." Kim makes dismissive facial gestures.