True Blood
True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1621 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Trust Me On The Sunscreen

Well done! She gives him permission for one hug, on tippy-toes. She has no idea that he's already sworn to the Light to protect another fairy, or what that will mean, or what it's done to him already. I think this story will be amazing, because the hug isn't what this scene is about: It's about last week, when Arlene told him the real world would always love him more than dreamland, forest-angel-ladies, drugs, and that Holly was the proof.

MEANWHILE

Sam says romantic things like, "Life is violent and cruel by nature, so when something good comes along you gotta stop and celebrate it," and Luna says fascinating things like, "I guess I'm on this show again next season."

STACKHOUSE

Jessica offers to give Jason a blowjob next time -- Hoyt was always nervous about the fangs -- and then takes off. They discuss at length about how Jason's not entirely happy with the no-strings relationship she's envisioning, because he's been through four seasons of this show and that Jason was pretty long ago at this point.

Jessica: "I'm leaving because fucking you made me hungry, and I don't want to drink your blood, because I'm not ready to be that intimate with you."
Jason: "So you're gonna glamour some total stranger and drink their blood?"
Jessica: "Yep. Happy Halloween."
Jason: "I get it. It's kinda like a hooker, with kissing."
Jessica: "Oh is it."
Jason: "Not that you're like a hooker."
Jessica: "Hell, maybe I'll dress up like one sometime."
Jason: "You're like no other woman I've ever been with. And I have been with a lot of women."
Jessica: "Oh God, that's... Actually really sweet."

She pops fang, giggles and takes off. He is cool with all of it. Jason Stackhouse, now working on four years of being the awesomest.

There's a knock at the door and he runs to it gladly, naked as a jaybird, but then you know who it is, instead of Jessica? Why, the good Reverend Steve Newlin, still looking adorable and not even bothering to stop staring at Jason's dick like a Tex Avery cartoon... and then what's this? Oh, fangs. Newlin's a vampire.

True Blood

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