True Blood
True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 548 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
The New Shape Of Myself

Chick: "Can I just say, before you became a vampire, you were a massive dick."
Steve: "I know!"

A little one-on-one in Bill's scrubbed-down office reveals a contrite Steve Newlin, who's more than willing to make amends... And also a deal for Jason's bod. Now obviously this isn't how things work, but Steve's pretty clueless, so Jessica strings him along for a gross little while before eventually laughing in his face, and then they fight and pull each other's hair, and it's a little problematic on the gay stuff so we'll just keep moving, and finally she's like, "My Dad's the King!" and Steve, once again indicating he's more on the ball than he's letting anybody know, just laughs at her about that. Then she imperiously throws the college kids out of the house, which considering they've been in those exact same positions for the last two or three nights, is probably best for everybody.

PATRICK'S MOTEL

Arlene: "Hey, nice motel room. Listen, do you have PTSD nightmares about fire where you physically attack your pretty significant other or anything? It's just for a survey."
Patrick: "I don't know what you're talking about."
Arlene: "The thing is, though, that I'm not actually as stupid as I come off. So..."

Terry: "Dang it Arlene, why are you in this motel?"
Patrick: "I think we all might have something to discuss. She's onto us and our weird secret."
Terry: "Fine. The guy you're looking for, Eller, he's in hiding."
Patrick: "That is the question I've been asking, yes. Thanks."
Terry: "Not finished. You know how I'm crazy as shit and can't even focus or act normal for like one minute?"
Patrick: "That has become clear in this episode, yes. It doesn't reflect on Arlene too great."
Terry: "Okay well keep that in mind as I explain to you that compared to me, Ellers is bughouse."

MAXINE'S

Jason: "Hoyt, sorry you're living in your mom's house and having to work on her sink in a tank top, but I want you to come back and live with me."
Hoyt: "That is not an appropriate request!"
Jason: "I know, Bubba, but I love you and I need everything to be okay. Come live at my house and I'll even go stay at Sookie's. Nothing weird ever happens there, it'll be fine."
Hoyt: "I'ma need you to GTFO now, okay? I am too busy navigating my gigantic sexy body around this fragile world of ours. And being a secret fangbanger and wearing makeup."
Maxine: "I must involve myself!"
Hoyt: "[More ungrateful stupid nonsense. His bad mood is so unearned and so, so obnoxious.]"

True Blood

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