Bill: "Also, you are a pussy and Ah can't believe you fell for Mah bullshit."
Eric: "That is SO RUDE. You know I would never buy into your crap or ask you for favors. I was just very sad due to the bioweapon death of my random sister."
Bill: "Get out of Mah house!"
Eric: "You can't take a picture of me. Know why? I'M ALREADY GONE. Boom!"
Raccoona has been joined by Threesome Girl and a giant Xena lady with harsh blonde bangs. They are like Charlie's Angels but horrible, and what their deal is, is that dumb Alcide who has been Packmaster for a week -- and has done nothing wrong, note -- should totally stop being Packmaster, just like his stupid dad suggested. Alcide can't back down and Raccoona is, I think, high on the V, so she has to challenge him to a big fight.
They fight. He doesn't kill her, but I guess it makes all the problems go away, and then he takes Nicole and her mom to go hang out with Sam, the only person in Louisiana that could even compete with how sucky he is.
Fuck you, Raccoona. Fuck you, werewolves. Enjoy each other's horrendous gross company.
GEN POP F
Willa, Pam and Tara talk about maybe borrowing Jason from Violet the Prison Boss, because they are so hungry. It is reestablished that he is her prag and that she will not share him and as long as we're talking about her and not to her I am okay, but I have a feel... There it is.
Violet: "You know how bad Nora could be on her bad days? You know Raccoona? I am like the Billith of that. Think of me as the Goddess of Shitty Boring Stuff."
Jason: "I'm just happy you're protecting me at this point. I haven't really thought it through. Let's talk about my backstory and my relationship with Sarah Newlin and whatever."
Violet: "Also I am like Warlow, in that even when we leave this place you are still Mine."
Jason: "From what Sookie's told me, being Somebody's is kind of a raw deal."
Violet: "I was a Catholic eight hundred years ago. It is very interesting."
Jason: "Is it?"
Violet: "FIND ME VERY INTERESTING."
Jason: "Tell me more about your Catholicism."
Violet: "Well, it means that when I make you my sex slave, that is in my crazy head like being married in the Church. Isn't that interesting and intriguing?"