RELIQUARY RM

Eric & Nora: "Let's talk about faith and religion and stuff, only not really."
Eric: "Hey, you used to be really cool and ambitious, and now you suck."
Nora: "That's what God did for me."
Eric: "Well, can you help me also learn to be insufferable and boring and useless?"
Nora: "Because I love you, I shall try."
Eric: "And because I love you, I shall silver you and kidnap you."
Nora: "As long as somebody's making my decisions for me!"
Eric: "You should see what they did to Tara in Season Two. This is nothing."

GUARDIAN SUITE

Salome does a totally queer bellydance for Bill and talks about how she's Salome, but now instead of that one story she's also going to be like the worldly avatar of Lilith or some such drugged-up self-aggrandizing nonsense. Turns out that she and Bill have been chosen to be the new Adam and Eve, which is just... I give up. This whole thing is like the end of that movie Bug when they just start improvising their crazy narrative.

Bill: "What if Ah don't want to be the Adam of your Lilith-Eve-Salome?"
Salome: "You do."
Bill: "Oh, okay."

She turns into Sookie, and he bites her so he can steal her blood, but then she turns into Lilith, so we get to deal with that gory mess, and then they fuck for a long time and it's mortifying to watch, and I guess at some point Bill just gave in? I mean, I misspoke, I meant to say, Who the fuck cares what is ever going on with Bill Compton?

DRAGON HOUSE

In the aftermath of Sam's pig-shaped ninja extravaganza, Jason cradles and worries at Hoyt, and Sam stands around naked and Sookie is still high as a kite. I'm sure there's more texturally that went on, but fuck Hoyt and fuck his pig-eaten face.

MERLOTTE'S

Patrick: "Your stupid wife plugged me in the neck with a hair chopstick, so I might die from that. You should probably just shoot me or else take me to a hospital so I can come back later and shoot you."
Terry: "None of those things sounds like the right option for me today."
Arlene: "Just shoot him, you retard. This storyline can end at any time."
Patrick: "Don't follow orders, like that time I told you to shoot a lady dozens of times in the fact for no reason!"
Terry: "I guess you're right and it wasn't my fault. That thing I did of my own volition."