True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: A-
The Pig It Was That Lived
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

The Bad & The Beautiful was a 1952 Vincent Minelli MGM film starring Lana Turner and Kirk Douglas. It was like Citizen Kane, but with Hollywood types doing the remembering: the writer, the actress, the director. The main character, Jonathan Shields, is a Hollywood scion and movie producer whose downturn in luck has caused another exec to bring his three victims together to help him make a new movie. They flashback to the various ways in which he created their fortunes, and betrayed them. It won five Oscars, and is a record holder for most awards won without being nominated for Best Picture. I don't know anybody that's ever seen it, but it's good: they're totally successful because of the bullshit he put them through, but they can barely even see straight about him, even years later, because he broke their hearts. He created them while he was destroying them, and they couldn't even see it:

It's barely dawn and Sookie is, since it's the beginning of an episode of True Blood, screaming bloody murder. This time it's because of naked Sam at the foot of her bed like the loveliest Christmas gift of a lifetime. When she demands to know what the hell he's doing there, he's still a little sleepy: "Nothing! Sleeping!" Sookie's next question is less humorous for being more understandable: "Did you touch me?" One day she'll wake up and that won't be the closest nightmare to hand. "Sookie, listen. Bill asked me to look after you while he was away..." Sookie, flattening herself against the headboard, every inch of her as far from him as possible, shivers and gasps: "Did he ask you to do it buck naked?" Man, even in PTSD she's awesome. "I want you out of here," she declares with her resolved face, and he shakes his head like a frustrated puppy:

"Now listen! Listen, Sookie, I need to tell you something about me. Something I've never told another person..." The last person who invaded her house, when she thought she was safe, killed her cat and left her body to be found, in the dark. "Oh my God, it's you! You're the murderer!" He reaches for her, and she slaps him, throwing herself off the bed: "Oh my God, you killed my grandmother!" Into the bathroom, where she quickly jumps behind the shower curtain and grabs a loofah. Not quite a murderous length of chain, but you can't always hit them out of the park. Eventually Sookie peeks around the curtain, horribly slowly, and there on the floor is Dean the border collie, looking up at her with sad eyes. Sam whines, and becomes a man. Standing in front of her, breathing hard, he swears he's not the killer. "I'm a shapeshifter," he says intensely, and Sookie smiles in wonder and bemusement, then becomes afraid as the world gets bigger again, and finally wrinkles her lip in derision. "Shut the fuck up."

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True Blood




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