Tommy reacts to being chained up by his gross parents not by turning into a bumblebee or rhinoceros, but by murdering both of them, so I guess now he's a Skinwalker. It's kind of sad, but also there is a sweetness in that he immediately drives their dead bodies over to Sam's house for help getting rid of them. One short V-inspired hassling from Andy Bellefleur later, they've given the bodies to the crocodiles and sort of made up about things.
Arlene and Terry invite good old Lettie Mae and Rev. Daniels over to the house for a quick exorcism -- which quickly becomes unsettlingly coded and circuslike in only the way an evangelical Lettie Mae situation could ever be -- but by nighttime the devil baby or devil doll or ghost of Renee has set fire to their house.
No news on Luna or her shifter/were daughter this week, but the packmaster of Shreveport visits Alcide and acts greasy on him -- apparently Alcide and Debbie were supposed to check in, upon moving from Mississippi, and they've let that slide for a few months. It's always so embarrassing when Alcide has to associate with werewolves just because he is one.
In the wake of Marnie's latest spell on Pam's face, Tara decides to head back to New Orleans, but Naomi's poorly timed discovery of Tara's many lies might put a crimp in that one. She heads over to Sookie's for some ice cream and sympathy, but feels terribly betrayed when Eric finally wakes up and blunders into their conversation. Meanwhile, Jesus and Lafayette take the ten-minute drive to Mexico's interior after Jesus reveals a story about his evil grandfather making him drink goat's blood.
Sookie goes undercover to get a reading from Marnie, which results in Adele speaking to her from beyond the grave and telling her Marnie is bad news. Later, Witch Spy Katie visits Marnie and ends up hauling her in for questioning. Bill glamours the poor old thing on behalf of vanished Eric and Pam's face, but Marnie can't help because of course she doesn't know what's going on. She does have another vision of her ghost witch buddy, Antonia, being subjected to terrors by vampire priests during the whole Spanish thing they keep bringing up and refusing to actually discuss: Turns out, we learn, that Antonia necromanted like 200 vampires to walk out into the sun this one time.
Jason has no idea he's stepping into a mess with Hoyt and Jessica's decomposing relationship, but between the sex dreams and Jessica's own weirdness about what she did to Hoyt -- as well as the upcoming full moon -- he's to be excused for paying less attention than usual. The saddest thing here is when Hoyt and Jason compare notes about their girl troubles, and neither of them know that Hoyt's been violated even worse than Jason. Anyway, he's weirded out for now but I think panther problems might be presenting themselves more urgently pretty soon.
After glamouring Portia Bellefleur to run screaming whenever she sees him. Bill brings his Sheriffs in for a meeting. The group includes a surviving vampire priest -- Olivier from Six Feet Under, grossly -- and also the awkward moment when still melting-down Pam accidentally reveals Eric's secret whereabouts.
Which is bad news, because Sookie's finally kissing Eric. After a nightmare in which Godric urges him to drink Sookie's blood, and her tenderly talking him down, Sookie's never quite felt so close to him. He's horrified by the things people say he's done, and pretty much completely in love with her; she's falling pretty fast herself, despite Adele's message that his wondrous new personality is only temporary.
SHAPESHIFTER TRAILER PARK
Joe Lee: "Just kidding, I didn't leave your gross mom!"
Tommy: "Stop choking me! If only I had magic powers. If only you owned pants!"
Joe Lee: "You will now be our main source of revenue because I broke your mom!"
Tommy: "Sure, after I wake up from this loss of consciousness."
Gross Mom: "Are you sure we're doing the right thing? Choking our kid out and then making him fight animals? Oh, and did I tell you he learned how to read?"
Tommy: "See now how the choke becomes the choker! Who's the bitch now?"
Fighting, fighting, trailer park family domestic situation of a sort I was not raised to accommodate or acknowledge.
Both Parents: Suddenly dead.
Tommy: Contrite about killing his mom. Does not know that he is now a Skinwalker.
MARNIE'S LATEST BAD IDEA
Marnie, waking up in the dirt of a witch circle: "Hey, what happened?"
Lafayette, verbatim: "Hooker, you pissed off another vampire and then you took a goddamn nap!"
Marnie: "Okay, my bad. I got possessed again by that ghost witch lady."
Jesus: "That's marginally interesting."
Lafayette: "Not really. Vampires aren't going to give a shit about that."
Marnie: "[More of her necromantic right-to-assemble nonsense which she does honestly believe and which is the secret nasty truth about this story line: Nobody ever thought they were doing evil, not once in history or time has anybody thought they were the villain. And the worse we get, the more we cling.]"
Team Lala: (Bounces, leaving dumb Marnie to clean up all her witch stuff.)
FOR BORED GIRLS + BOYS WHO HAVE WASTED PRECIOUS SCREENTIME ON ARLENE WHEN NAKED ALCIDE IS ENUF
Arlene: "Our devil baby wrote on the wall!"
Terry: "That seems unlikely, although Occam's Razor does support your theory."
Arlene: "I wish I hadn't tried for that magical abortion, or else Jesus might help us out."
Terry: "Maybe we should get a priest, actually. Or some Holy Roller equivalent."
Generally I think complaining about the number of characters and/or plotlines on this show is tantamount to admitting you're too stupid to keep up, or too lazy to resist the meme and form your own opinion -- or, worst of all, just hypothetically bitching like people who scream SPOILERS even though they've already been spoiled and everybody has been spoiled and it wasn't even a spoiler and they're just doing it because they want to feel like hero cops of the internet -- but Arlene makes me wonder. And then shit like this happens, and it all seems okay again: