Sam: "What about war? Or self-defense?"
Tommy: "I guess sometimes murder is acceptable."
Sam: "See? Easy."
Tommy: "When you killed the people that it's become entirely obvious that you killed, was that war? Or self-defense?"
Sam: "It was a different time. I had a completely different, slicked-back hairstyle."
Tommy: "Our mom is just floating in the water next to our dad. I have cramps."
Sam: Tosses out some marshmallows, and instantly some alligators (crocodiles?) come roiling up with their rubber tails going crazy, as if they were just hanging around under the bodies waiting for the idea of marshmallows to eat the flesh right in front of them.
Tommy: "Cool trick, Mr. Wizard! Can we go back to pretending we're brothers and you're kind of like my dad? I am the loneliest person on earth."
TERRY & ARLENE FUCK & IT'S GROSS & THEN THEIR HOUSE CATCHES ON FIRE BECAUSE IT DIDN'T WORK & WAS ALSO KIND OF RACIST
In this scene, Terry and Arlene fuck and it is gross, and then it gets grosser:
Arlene: "Terry Bellefleur, sometimes I look at you and I feel like it could actually turn out all right. You know? Like I can relax, and stop expecting life to keep kickin' me in the teeth like it always has."
Terry: "Baby, I look at you and I know everything already has turned out all right. And all the crap I went through before meeting you was worth it."
Then their house catches on fire, because it didn't work. Also, it was kind of racist. Also, when you say that shit you are asking for it. Also, and most of all, stop blaming other people and things for your shitty lives.
Jason has this sex dream about Jessica, and right away he's super guilty and she's acting super horny, and the whole time she's talking him into it she keeps talking about Hoyt, and then Hoyt shows up at their bedside providing color commentary, and then Jessica's actually fucking him and yelling Hoyt's name, and Jason keeps yelling his own name, and then all of a sudden it's Hoyt that he's fucking, and Hoyt is saying his own name, and that's when Jason finally wakes up. And he acts like it's super weird, but if you had a nickel for every time Jason accidentally dreamed about fucking a dude, you would have a fair amount of nickels. It sort of comes with the territory.
Jason upon waking, amazingly enough: "Oh my gravy!"