True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: B
Pictures Of The Floating World

Eric calls Yvetta out from whatever place she hangs out when she's not writhing around, so she can witness the signing; he writes her name underneath using her hand, in a pretty brutal fashion. At some point Yvetta figures out that she's getting nothing out of this deal, if he does die, and starts throwing a mail-order tantrum. They yell in Russian for awhile, and Eric says that their deal was a job and awesome sex, both of which she's still enjoying, so stop being a quote "gold-digging whore." Even Pam is a bit offended by this. Maybe they go off and have some sex or something but this scene is more about Eric looking dazed and sort of horrified by everything. Did he really think that the Authority would help him take out the King after he was the one who drove him crazy?

Jesus thinks Lafayette is giving Cal V so that he will trip his way out of this life, because he doesn't know all the powers of the blood. But he's a nurse, a healer, which means he's going to be very fascinated by this process. One little drip down Cal's throat, and then they wait a few seconds, and before you know it Cal's back up hitting people and screaming epithets and punching his daughter and very angry. Turns out Hotshot is all about bloodlines and purity -- hence the breeding program -- and now, he thinks, he's lost his shot because his blood is tainted by theirs.

"Them fuckers is a whole new dimension of trash," mutters Lafayette -- and truer words -- as Crystal goes tearing off after her dad in the forest. Calvin is not happy with Crystal, because as he sees it, his daughter got his ass kicked by a shifter, and then two homosexuals gave him dirty blood, and also Crystal is refusing to "mate" with Felton, and "mixing" with regular folks, and anyhow generally everybody is just ruining his day. Crystal protests that she doesn't love Felton and Calvin says that love has nothing to do with her duty to lay there horrified by life and then some months later bust out a litter of kittens. Crystal assures him she's not going back to Juniper Hotshot, and Cal disowns her. Somehow I think this is not the end of that, though. Jason is so good at causing himself trouble that the trouble has started causing itself.

Nan Flanagan comes on TV to disavow Russell in the wake of his "extremist terrorist" attacks, and says that condemning all vampires for this would be like condemning all human men because of Jeffrey Dahmer. Which is true, insofar as that goes, but also leaves out the somewhat salient part where two years ago all the vampires were Jeffrey Dahmer. Also, everything Russell said was totally true. Also, he is still on the loose. Also, Nan Flanagan drinks people blood on the regular. But politics, you know, it's a bendy world.

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True Blood




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