True Blood
True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 464 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Picture Me & Then Start Watching

Martha: "Training hard, I see. Get it? Werewolf boner joke! Anyway, JD told me he wasn't on V and that you were a poopy-pants and since I believe everything he tells me, I believed that too. Swore on my son's grave."
Alcide: "Respectfully, Martha? Your son doesn't have a grave. Because y'all ate him."
Martha: "Okay, here's the backstory. My first husband was Packmaster, and when he died, JD didn't claim it, even though everybody would have wolf-voted for him. Instead he devoted himself to raising Marcus to be Packmaster, to [and I quote] teaching him what only a he-wolf can teach."
Rikki: "It's true, I'll give them that."
Alcide: "But you guys, Marcus was the worst!"
Martha: "Nevertheless, it's JD's 'turn' now. You people. Anyway, I gotta take Emma for a walk now."

ARLENE

Is watching her wedding videos, which is like a documentary within the show of Things Jacob Personally Doesn't Give A Shit About, but there are some cute/poignant moments in there: Andy being super sweet, Holly being cute, Jason missing Sookie (fairy vacation) and still being a horndog, Jessica and Hoyt being a vision of loveliness and affection, Lafayette being kinda awful and Jesus being wonderful which makes them both wonderful somehow, Sam yelling like a dork that can't read a room... All the things you'd assume. Holly comes in and comforts her, but they both kinda lose it when it cuts to a sneak shot of Terry kissing Arlene's Mikey belly.

Holly: "All is not lost, you ridiculous woman."
Arlene: "He's crazy, Holly. Gone. Deep end. Round the bend."
Holly: "No, he has PTSD. Get real."
Arlene: "He came back last night, Holly, and he looked like shit, and he told me there's a spirit made of smoke chasing him around the country. Hunting him down. I don't care if that's PTSD or a full break, I am not having that."
Holly: "Um, or else we're on True Blood, you idiot, and that's actually what's going on? Just like every other day of our entire lives?"

SOOKIE

Jason: "Wake up, Sook. I don't know how to make lunch, so I made you breakfast instead."
Sookie: "You are the best."
Jason: "I try. So um, I'm going to say this in absolutely the worst way, but trust me it's not a bad thing. Assumption number one is that we both have always felt like it was my fault that our parents died, and you've always been really cool about that."
Sookie: "I don't really think like that, but yeah. We were really young, and the whole thing was really unfair."
Jason: "Well, now that we know it's kind of your fault, because of the faerie blood in the backseat, I don't want you to think that it's your fault. I want you to know that I don't."
Sookie: "First of all, good mind-reading. And second of all, thanks? For this, you may eat my bacon."
Jason: "That's really all I wanted."

True Blood

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