True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C | 1 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Define "Screw"

This sort of a trap is very much a bummer, and can take you to some pretty bizarre places that you mightn't expect, because this sort of a trap is very much about becoming your entire universe. I realize it's only been about twenty minutes, but in terms of personal agency and the like... For a guy who can go ahead and sleep in the ground like a worm whenever he needs to, it takes a lot to develop claustrophobia.

Russell notes Lorena's lack of sophistication, even at her age, and tells Bill about how one of Lorena's bright ideas was to make Bill watch while she killed Sookie. Which, yes, that would work, because his humanity is tenuous and contingent, but more importantly -- and obviously there's a reason I'm going to keep ringing this particular bell, having to do with the monster at the end of this episode -- because any retaliation would prove Lorena right. It's a very Catch-22, quantum physics kind of a problem to have. It's also a sort of Maryann Forrester problem to have, if you think about it: If your loss of control means somebody else is in control, then they can do whatever they want to you and either way, they win. (Of course, in real life, any loss of control puts somebody else in control, but it's not magic. Even if it feels like it at the time.)

I've never felt a huge amount of sympathy for old Bill, because he makes his own drama so very vigorously so very much of the time, but in this case my heart just bleeds for him. Bill's in a cage and it's making him crazy, and it only took about five minutes, because Bill is already fucking crazy. He's just really good at hiding it.

Russell changes the subject to whether or not Buffy and Angel can truly be together, because eventually she'll get old and die and he'll stay young and beautiful forever -- you know, like David Boreanaz did -- and so why not turn Sookie, like how Russell turned Talbot centuries ago. He sort of moans about how vampire gay marriage is like the realest kind of marriage. I'm inclined to agree, because I can't imagine spending ten minutes with Talbot without murdering him, much less centuries. Bill says it's impossible, because of his own personal Edward Cullen problems about being a vampire, and Russell says that the alternative is to subject her to the vicissitudes of mortality and to the mercy of "forces." In case Bill didn't get the implication -- and it's Bill we're talking about -- Russell gets wicked scary for a second: The "forces" are, or include, Russell himself.

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True Blood

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