True Blood

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: C | 1 USERS: A-
Define "Screw"

Bill points out that, as blackmail goes, it's pretty much overkill. "Take this job or I'll eat your girlfriend alive" isn't something you hear a whole lot. Well, Hollywood. But Russell says it's a totally valid choice, given degree of subjective reality Sookie Stackhouse really represents. It's like saying, "Do this massively important thing for me, or I'm gonna step on your toe so very hard."

The toe, in this case, being Sookie. Which is ironic, because what Russell doesn't know, but is almost sure to find out, is that Sookie is the actual prize. He's got a few pieces of the puzzle, but because of Lorena's obsession with Bill, he thinks Bill's the point. But Bill is not, will never be, the point, because Bill is exactly what he seems to be. So once Russell figures out why Bill was actually in Bon Temps, the whole thing's gonna tip sideways and it's going to be, "If you don't come work for me" -- or whatever -- "I'm going to kill your vampire boyfriend," or whatever.

"Is it your human's welfare you value, or your own desire? You are a fraction of my age," Russell says. "One day you'll see you can't have both." I love how Bill's in kindergarten and everybody knows it. Since we spend so much time with Sookie -- who thinks he is a million years old and knows how magnets work and whatever -- it's easy to forget the fact that, for most of the thirty-thousand characters on this show, he's basically what he appears to us to be: An adorable sad puppy of a boy, whose OCD and spectrum disorder cause him to live a very particular and sort of lonely kind of life.

Eric, on the other hand, is fun, like "Sookie! Field trip to the graveyard!" fun. He explains about how when you're hiding a body, sometimes it's fun to toss it into a fresh grave, so that nobody questions it. Even Sookie must admit that this is a smart idea, but she's more concerned about bitching at him for killing the werewolf that was about to kill him while she stood there doing nothing whatsoever. And don't think she didn't notice that the Werwolf thing sent him into turbo, don't you even think it. Eric tries to explain that yes, it's kind of personal, but also did you know werewolves are a big deal. Which, given what we've seen and what we'll see tonight, I'm still not convinced. There's only one kind of bitch on this show that you can't kill with a snapped neck. As we shall see.

But anyway, sell the drama some more, Eric. "You have no concept of how dangerous werewolves are. They're virtually silent. They have no fear of death. And when they've had a bit of our blood, their strength can be a challenge. Even for me." She thanks him for saving her life, because she has a sense of fair play sometimes, and he sort of jokes with her about sucking the bullet out of him like last time, and then they head back home.

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True Blood




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