Hoyt tries to drill Jason on the written test for becoming a policeman, but he's skipped twenty-two questions before Hoyt finally tries to change the subject to his weirdly incomplete breakup with Jessica. Jason finally deigns to weigh in. "All right, listen. I've heard every breakup excuse, from You're a son of a bitch, Stackhouse to You're a fucking asshole, Jason. And you know what? They're all saying the same thing: They can't handle the heat you're packing." Also, that you are a fucking asshole son of a bitch. They are also saying that same thing.
"So Jessica is having trouble handling my 'heat'?" Hoyt asks, delightfully confused. Jason says that Hoyt needs to move on, always be closing on somebody hotter like Jason does, but Hoyt can't quite picture anybody better than Jessica. There is nobody better than Jessica, is why. Jason sort of vaguely changes the subject back to himself, about how there's two kinds people: "People who got no dreams, people who got dreams and don't do nothing about it, and people who go out and fulfill their dreams." Jason is the third kind of those two. Additionally, he notes, probably Andy Bellefleur doesn't know anything on the written test either, and then says the most Jason thing ever: "There's gotta be an easier way. Look, I'm ready now. You know? I know between good and evil. I'm like a ninja-level marksman. I got all the training I need." Additionally, the practice test is worthless, because those questions won't be on the test. Mind blown by Jason's stern and practiced rejection of all reality, Hoyt is mum as Jason walks out the door and into the next thing.
Arlene worries at the OB about the baby, and Terry, and whatever, hilariously: "Maybe this is the good Lord telling me that this man's a keeper. Right? I mean, don't you think? You know, children being a blessing and all?" There is the usual obstetrics weirdness, and then the doctor reveals a curious fact: She's like nine weeks in. But the orgies were just a few days ago! This is Rene's issue from the first season! Arlene is carrying a serial killer baby!
Over at Merlotte's there's a moment of stress between Terry and Tara before she answers the phone, bitchily. It's good old Mike Spencer, down at the Bon Temps graveyard, calling to invite her to Eggs Talley's funeral. When she gets there, it's just Mike: Nobody else. No loved ones, because Mike couldn't find any. Just him. So then who threw the funeral? He looks over to the side, and Sookie comes wandering out into the sun. Tara's heart skips a little. "I did. I understand if you don't want me here, but I thought at the very least Eggs deserved a real funeral." She takes Sookie into her arms, admitting that the funeral doesn't really help her feel better, but nobody understands that better than Sookie.