The rule is that when you're being balls-out (because this conversation is essential to the Sookie/Jessica Menstruation Talk coming up) and the subtext is climbing up the face of the text like a spider until it's all you can see, you can't also turn to the audience and say: "On behalf of Oscar Winner Alan Ball and the talented cast and crew of True Blood, we are going balls-out at this time. FYI." It's gotta be one or the other. You can't be meta about being meta, because if you do it too many times it'll go all Foucault's Pendulum on you and then there really will be vampires, and who needs that.

"All raaht, so whut do you suggest Ah do? Just spole the girl? Give in to her every whuim and dizarr? After awl, that ee-is what every teenage girl wonts, isn't it?" Um, yes, but that wasn't what she was saying and you know the rule in my house, reductio ad absurdum means in a direct relation reduction in fellatio, because that's not how adults talk to each other, and she's like, "A) Bill Compton, lose the tone, and B) Bill Compton, maybe you should consider the point I'm making, since your bullshit isn't working out so hot." (Considering it's still the night Jessica showed up, we'll give them a pass for nudging us gently to this new status quo.) He agrees, and then they're like, "Remember how we were only fighting so we could fuck some more?" They're so, like, in sync that way. It's beautiful.

Pam takes Eric to task about his hair, because the stuff was already in it which means the blood is like dye now. "This is a disaster. We'll have to go much shorter than I planned." He's back in his smock, in the chair, with Lafayette watching, terrified. The concept of Lafayette being so freaked out that he can't even spare a moment for the hilarity of all this is really dreary, isn't it? Of all people. Eric is contrite, and demands that Lafayette back him up: "But he took silver to me! You were there, you saw it. Defend me!" Lafayette just wants to know why he's there; what they want so he can give it to them. Survivor first.